Tag: #strongfoundations

In praise of age

by Terah Drake, posted in Uncategorized

I have not withdrawn into despair, I did not go mad in gathering honey, I did not go mad, I did not go mad, I did not go mad. – Hoda Al-Namai

Thinking a lot about how our society views getting older lately.   

I’ve never had a huge concept of “age”, but I experience the unhealthy concept we have of getting olderin our culture of age-obsessed thinking. 

It’s everywhere we look.  

It’s in Hollywood, in politics, in social media.  

We think we should look 18 when we’re 80.  Or at least, 25 when we are 50 and “youth culture” tells us that we are no longer valid.  

Topically, in my experience, (and quantum theory backs this up) the degree that we age is very much based upon the degree that we accept what society tells us is true about age. 

I’ve been told that I look significantly younger than I am my entire adult life.  Part of this is because I believe my body is my temple, and I care for it well, but beyond that, I just don’t think about what I am. “supposed to” look, feel, or be like at any given age. 

I haven’t quite cracked the code on not aging at all; skin cells still break down, and the rate at which they replicate may not be the same at 50 as it is at 15, but our mindset can hugely influence just how rapidly our aging markers shorten.

From every other perspective beyond what we are told about our held value, getting older is an incredible experience.  

Because I have lived many years here on earth,I’ve had ample time and opportunity to learn, to grow, and to

examine the doctrines and dogma that I was brought up with.  

I’ve had years to recognize, acknowledge, and fall in love with those previously lost parts of myself that I had disconnected from out of shame, or guilt, or fear. 

I have had decades to sift through and discard any previous belief systems that do not serve my best, my most true, and highest self.  

Because of my years of experience; the joys and the losses, the challenges and the triumphs, the grief, and the bliss, I am so much more settled into the gorgeous, full and authentic human, be-ing than I ever have before.  

I can feel the strength of my foundation; something I certainly did not have in my teens, 20s, or even my 30s.  

I feel completely safe in exploring alternate ideas and ideologies from what I have learned to date. 

In fact, I have come to realize that this is the best way to keep growing – and having the stable foundation of what feels true to me keeps my value system intact while I approach new things with curiosity.

I have learned that my value is not in the constant need to be validated by others.  

I don’t have to “Do” to prove my worth.  I love who I am, exactly as I am.  

For that matter, I don’t have to prove my worth to anyone, and I don’t have to stay in a room where my care and value is not recognized or appreciated.  

I am not in any way saying I am close to whatever “perfect” is supposed to be, and being a little more aware doesn’t mean that I don’t make mistakes.  

But rather than judging or shaming myself, I have learned to take a step back, acknowledge the “mistake“ or misaligned behavior, and then look for the root of that sabotaging behavior.  

When I was actively teaching martial arts, one of my favorite things was those moments when one of my advanced students would get a good strike in on me in the sparring ring. 

It didn’t happen often, but when it did, I would always get a little thrill, because that little “zing” would show me an area of weakness that I may not have recognized otherwise. 

I’ve taken that lesson into every aspect of my life.

We humans are such beautifully complex creatures, and our past can influence our presence, but one of the most powerful lessons that I have learned is that it doesn’t have to be our identity.  

Like that kick to the gut, or punch to the jaw, (geared up, ofc) I may have an area in my psyche that I’m not paying attention to, or have a link to a past identity or egoic construct that I didn’t previously recognize.  

I can acknowledge the trauma, the challenges, the losses, and the accompanying patterns that grew as a result of those past experiences – but I get to decide the meaning – and how I frame – the emotions and residual vibration of those life experiences.  

I can allow the energy that lies behind me to be anchors that keep me tied to the past, or I can embrace them as lessons that provide ammunition for future growth and evolution.  

Perhaps the only real “truth” that I know for certain is that when I’m in the present moment, the past is no longer real.  

With each turn around the sun this physical and spiritual embodiment of my Self takes, I have become more deeply attuned to the world and other souls around me; able to “see” what keeps people stuck, but I have also lost any sense of judgment over where people are at in their personal journey. 

I love it when my experience and ability to heal or empower can be a catalyst for healing or growth in others, but my years of living this life have taught me that I don’t need to be a “savior” to those around me. 

I may be able to guide another soul who is ready along the path a bit; the reason I got trained in and and started my healing “business“, but I have learned that it has never been my place to try to change any other soul who doesn’t want to change, no matter how  “good” I may have thought my intentions to be. 

I have also learned that the law of equal exchange is both real and valid. I used to give my services away for free, or ask very little in exchange for my lifetime of experience in empowering, healing, and coaching others – then be hurt when the teaching or training I had given away was neither valued or implemented. 

 I have come to realize that if someone truly wants the help that I can provide, the equal exchange of energetic currency is incredibly important, and devaluing myself also devaluates their experience.  

When I was very young, I had a bit of a “Cinderella” complex.  

 Because of the lens that we are taught through fantasy and fairytale, I associated my childhood trauma with the idea of some prints or Savior who would sweep in to save the day, making all of my dreams come true, and fulfilling my every heart’s desire.

In gaining both years and experience on this earth, I have realized that there is no fairytale hero who will save me.   I have to be the hero of my own life, as we all do.  

I believe this is the primary lesson of this existence, here on earth.  

If we learn to love and heal ourselves, and in doing so, experience firsthand our incredible power and ability to shape our individual reality, the magnetic resonance of that love, healing and self-creation is projected into the Field, and may provide the spark for someone else to find wholeness, too.✨

This is how we save the world. This is how we heal our planet; one beautiful soul awakening to their incredible value, beauty, and power, becoming a ripple that spreads into the ocean of this reality.  

We are the new Christs, creating heaven on earth.  

This is the importance, and immeasurable value of each additional year we spend on this planet, in this time space reality. 

So darling, the next time you look in the mirror and see the physical evidence of your time here, celebrate that shit.  

Own your age, in your completely unique perspective. 

Trash whatever opinions someone else tries to force down your throat in what you or your life is supposed to look like at any given age.  

Wear the flowers, or the stripes, the sparkles or the tie-dye, or whatever suits you, Boo.

Keep your hair long, or rock a mohawk.  

Follow your bliss.  Follow your heart.  Listen to the whispers of your soul.  

Love yourself, and recognize your incredible contribution and value on this planet. 

Be gorgeously, gratefully, fully what you are.

But please, beloved, for the love of All That Is, stop thinking that your value ends at whatever perceived age your culture or society may tell you is valid.  Let go of old and outdated identities that no longer serve your highest self. 

Cast them off like an old coat that is three sizes too small and horribly outdated.

Step into the glorious version of yourself, as you are, right now.  

It’s more than enough, I promise.  

Big love.💖

  • Terah 

Staying connected through life’s storms

by Terah Drake, posted in Uncategorized

Hello, Beautiful.

Are you a lucid dreamer?  Do you find yourself thinking about your dreams during the day?

When we dream, we are every aspect of the dream.  We are the Observer and the Participants.  We are the people in the dream; from the little girl in the candy shop to the old man playing the oboe.  We are the little white terrier who is biting ankles or sitting obediently.  We are every blade of grass, ray of sunshine, shimmering leaf.  

Alot like this, I like to think of people as trees;  from the root system/foundation – our younger years – to the tiptop and outermost branches; our older selves.  But we are also the creatures that call the tree home, as well the caretakers that promote the tree’s optimal growth and beauty.  

There can be days, weeks, and even years when it feels like we are just growing slowly;  waving gently in the breeze while birds and squirrels cavort in the branches.  It occasionally rains or gentle winds cause leaves to drop to the base to become compost, fertilizing the roots and creating more growth.  Just as it should be. 

But sometimes, life brings heavy storms.   The passing of a loved one, divorce, losing friends, or members of our tribe, financial crisis, natural disasters, and moving can all be examples of these storms.  These times inevitably suck major testes, but thi is where things can get also really interesting in a wonderful, awful sort of way.  

Those hurricane-force winds begin shaking not only our branches but the trunk itself, causing what may feel like our entire network of leaves and small branches to fall to the base of our tree. 

This upheaval can begin to clog our roots.  If we have unresolved childhood trauma, the emotional, energetic and psychic blocks that this can cause will compound the problem.

These upheavals can be such a frightening experience.  As a result, all too often, we take on the persona of the birds and squirrels, retreating to the topmost branches or hovering above where it may feel safer but creates even more emotional distance from our root system.  

When we spend too much time in  this place, we may become so disconnected from our foundation that our root system begins to suffocate and rot. If we allow this to continue, we succumb to emotional and physical illness, aging before our time, and a host of other ailments that ultimately, keep us from living our best  possible lives.

But if we remain present through the process – and connected to our inner caretaker –  he will wade into the compost and get to work freeing up the root system to create space; aeration of that heavy load of decaying matter, allowing it to become a kickass fertilizer that supercharges our health and growth, allowing us to become the fullest, most beautiful expression of who we are meant to be.  

But let’s be frank. Who really wants to wade into a swamp of fertilizer? It stinks. It’s thick and sludgy and difficult. 💩

Self-growth is damned  hard, sometimes. Oftentimes. Most times.😬

For me, when those inevitable “storms” come, as they have, hard and fast,  in the past couple of years, “doing the work“ often looks like hours of insomnia in the middle of the night, where my mind insists that I process through much of that fertilizer, both past and present.  It sucks.

 Of course, I have the choice of drinking myself into a stupor, taking a sleeping pill to avoid the 3 AM wake up call or just telling my caretaker to get lost (or f#ck off). 

 It often feels like it would be much easier to take on the Persona of the squirrels and birds, looking down at the narsty mire clogging my roots with a “hellllll naw” attitude. 😳

But here’s where the wonderful part comes in. 

When I make the commitment to face the fears, insecurities, anxieties, and past trauma, I experience revelation that allows me to free up some of the space closest to my foundation, enabling not only better growth, but also a feeling of lightness and freedom that wasn’t there when I went to bed.  I also often get the opportunity to meet lost aspects of myself that I didn’t even know existed, creating greater integration into the fullness of who I am.  (if you are interested in learning more about this, check out IFS therapy. It’s powerful stuff.)

I may have gone to bed feeling bound and heavy, but by the time I have gotten up, had a cup of coffee, and done a little more processing of my nocturnal “work”, it feels like my branches are widespread, open, and shimmering gloriously in the morning light. 

I would like you to also experience this revelation in the times when life feels difficult. You are a beautiful, amazing being of light and deserve to feel happy as often as possible, even when life hits you with challenging storms.  

It may not be easy.  But babe, you are worth the effort. 

Much love.💖

– Terah

Healthy Habits & Goals; Creating Strong Foundations

by Terah Drake, posted in Uncategorized

Each morning I spend time in meditation and reading wisdom.  For over ten years one of the teachers whose books have inspired me has been Rolf Gates.  I have a sense of reverence, resonance, and gratitude each time I pick up my dog-eared  copy of meditations from the mat, and his words often inspire my own writing.   

This morning the lesson was from his second book of reflections, Meditations on intention and being – finding your mountain; your sense of calm, steadiness and purpose.  

For me, I also relate this to establishing a firm foundation; something many of us have felt lacking this last year.  I certainly have.

This morning in meditation I was relating this idea to the volcanic activity that happens to create mountains.  The earth shakes violently, magma erupts from the ground and from this violence mountains begin to grow.  

This past year has felt like that, hasn’t it?  Many of us have had our lives completely shaken, altered from what it had been for years or even decades before.  

But what better time than the beginning of a new year to start rebuilding – or perhaps just repairing those parts of our foundations that have been crumbling?  

growing beautifully, rooted firmly

In yoga , we begin with our feet to establish strength and ease in an asana – yoga pose.  

Feeling energy beneath every part of our foundation, often the foot or the palms, we root ourselves into the mat to allow the asana to grow from that place.  

Life is just like this.  If we establish a firm foundation before we begin a new journey, venture, practice, or year, feeling into each aspect of where we would like to go, we will establish a firm foundation that will allow us to grow towards the heavens in strength and beauty .

Establishing healthy habits is essential in beginning to build a strong foundation.  How do you begin and end each day?  Do you take time for self-care? Learning? Meditation? Healthy eating?

Keeping those healthy habits that help you function better is a fabulous goal in itself, but If you have a specific goal or goals, it is so important to write them down.  A goal that stays in our head is simply a daydream.  For most of us, we need to have something that feels tangible to keep us on task or we tend to slide back into our old patterns. 

 If you want to achieve something specific, try breaking your goals down into steps.  For example, maybe your dream has been to be a surgeon but life got in the way before you could achieve those dreams.  You met someone, fell in love and had children.  But that dream has become a cry from your soul to be fulfilled.  So you decide it’s time to move forward with your dream.

 If you wanted to get into med school next fall, that goal might seem unattainable.  But writing down the specific steps you need to get there can make the process feel much easier.  It’s like the old adage – “How do you eat an elephant?  One bite at at time.”   

Bubble graph example. Fill in each with your own dreams and goals!

Creating a bubble graph is a great way to break things down into bite-sized pieces.  You might begin with deciding which school is both desirable and accessible to you.  Online schooling is becoming more and more easy to find.  Is there a school where you can take the majority of your classes online and do the practicals on-campus intermittently?  

Let’s say you find the school, study for and pass the MCAT.  You apply for admission and are accepted.  Next would be finding grants and scholarships to cover the cost of tuition and possibly some of your day-to-day expenses such as childcare when your partner is not available.  

After that, entering school is your biggest step!  You can break down each semester’s classes in much the same way that you created your bubble graph to keep you on-task. 

Keeping things structured on a calendar that you can reference each day is a great way to keep you focused on whatever your goals might be.  

Today, I am creating my own bubble graph and making the commitment to keep to those healthy habits that keep me on-track and moving in the right direction.  I recognize that achieving the reality that I wish to see may be a slow process, like the forming of mountain peaks, but staying connected to my foundation will help me to see my dreams realized infinitely faster than having no foundation at all.   Whatever your dreams, aspirations or goals for 2021, I hope you achieve them all, and more.  You deserve it!✨ 💖✨