Hello gorgeous;
We’ve all heard the adage “Fake it until you make it”.
This advice can help us to get to the place that we want to be – or cause an emotional trainwreck if we aren’t being honest about where we currently are at the same time.
Does this sound like a bit of a contradiction? 🤔
In simple terms, we are creatures of habit. Our brains are vast fields of neurological pathways, and these pathways are the tracks for our physiological, emotional and psychological patterns, conscious and subconscious.
The route we take to go to work each day is a pathway. The apple oatmeal and black coffee that we enjoy for breakfast each morning. The way we respond to our partner, parents or friends when we are joyful and excited – or feeling criticized and devalued. Our habits of industriousness or sloth. Our temperament, routines and rituals, tendency to isolate or our extroverted qualities, the way we value others – or ourselves.
All of these and every other thing we do and think are pathways through the dense field that is our mind and brain matter.
This is good news because it means when it comes to pulling ourselves out of the mud to begin the trek to the top of the mountain – that place of expansive views, joy, connection and the deliberate creation of our best possible life – it is, more than anything, just an action that we continue practicing until it becomes a habit.
In the same way that we learn and improve when we practice the piano, painting, a new profession or study habit, picking ourselves up out of the mud to move on to something better after a period of grief, depression, anger or inertia is essentially the same mental action as picking up that paintbrush, textbook or laptop to prune old programs and replace them with new habits and neurological subroutines.
It might feel uncomfortable, difficult or challenging to begin, but once we practice envisioning a new reality for ourselves – or maybe a new identity would be more appropriate – and we begin to act upon what it is that we wish to see and become, eventually, that vision becomes our new way of being – our new reality.
Imagine • Practice • Do • Become
So what is it, ultimately, that you would like your life to look like in six months? A year? Three years? Five years?
How would you like to see your personal reality unfold? What would your close relationships look like?
Where would you like to live? Do you see yourself in a villa by the ocean, living in an urban setting – or maybe a tiny cabin in the woods?
What would you see yourself doing for a living – what do you think or feel that your purpose is?
What would your income be?
What would you imagine your daily habits being? Do you go to the gym or run each morning, do you meditate, or sleep in until 10?
How will you change your life? Whatever you can envision, you can achieve.✨😎
Let me give you an example from a friend/client of mine:
“Rebecca” grew up in a dysfunctional home. She was taught that her value was in what she did rather than who she was and it was best if she was “seen and not heard”.
So of course, Rebecca grew up to behave in ways that reflected this value system.
She neglected her own well being. She put all of her energy into caring for others. She withdrew when there was conflict or when she was emotionally uncomfortable.
She topically believed she had successful relationships, all the while avoiding real intimacy.
Eventually Rebecca found herself depressed. She assumed it was just the “pressures of life” and took antidepressants – but while it seemed like she wasn’t really depressed and unable to function anymore, she still didn’t feel emotionally connected to her life. 😓
In fact, she didn’t feel very emotionally connected to anything other than a growing sense of desperation and anger, emotions that she desperately tried to suppress.
Can you relate to Rebecca’s story so far?
Eventually, Rebecca began to see a counselor 🥰 who helped her look at childhood patterns that were causing huge blocks in her ability to experience joy, to value herself, to adapt and evolve – and how those patterns were reflected in her current relationships.
She spent some time grieving for the many years she had neglected to care for the physical and emotional needs and wellness of herself and her inner child as a result of those patterns.
She learned to reset her vibrational field to allow good to come to her rather than repelling her wishes and dreams due to her subset programs of scarcity and lack of value.
She discovered that she had to learn to self-care and nurture her personal growth, set healthy boundaries with others, and began to prune some of the toxic people who couldn’t accept her boundaries, growth and the radical responsibility for the shaping of her personal reality. This was a process that was deeply painful but also deeply cathartic.
Fast forward three years. Rebecca is living the life that she hadn’t realized she was missing. She has a truly successful relationship with a partner who enjoys healthy dialogue and honest communication. This honesty also means intimacy and she understands what real vulnerability and intimacy means.
She has taken up several hobbies that had interested her in childhood and although she reports that it is sometimes frustrating to not be “better” than she is, she loves the process of learning and slowly gaining skill.
She had quit her corporate job a couple of years back, and now works largely from home contracting her skills to large companies. She loves the freedom this gives her.
She also makes it a point to spend time with friends and family each week to recreate and build personal relationships.
In short, she has radically turned her life around.
Rebecca still has occasional days when she feels a little blue. But knowing that feeling connected, happy and deliberately creating her life is just so much better, she gives herself some grace and space to deeply feel on those days, but also keeps envisioning an ever-expanding future – and joyfully continues to expand into that future.
And you know what? Rebecca’s blue days will become less and less the more she practices bliss, curating and cultivating the life of her dreams, healthy communication and community with others and most importantly, loving herself into wholeness. How cool is that?
If Rebecca’s story resonates with you, I’d love to hear your story, too. How do you lift yourself from the mud after those days that you need to give yourself a little more grace and space to feel deeply and acknowledge those past parts of yourself that might still feel a little broken?
What habits do you practice that keep your vision clear and ever-expanding and your vibrational field humming at a frequency that allows good to come to you – rather than repelling it with hidden subconscious programs?
Drop me a comment below!⬇️☺️
And just in case you needed to be reminded today, you are amazing. You are valuable. You are a magnificent creation and capable of achieving anything you can dream of, and babe, you are so very loved.🥰
Healing, hugs and much love;
- Terah💖
This Blessed Sacred Life 