Are you a lucid dreamer? Do you find yourself thinking about your dreams during the day?
When we dream, we are every aspect of the dream. We are the Observer and the Participants. We are the people in the dream; from the little girl in the candy shop to the old man playing the oboe. We are the little white terrier who is biting ankles or sitting obediently. We are every blade of grass, ray of sunshine, shimmering leaf.
Alot like this, I like to think of people as trees; from the root system/foundation – our younger years – to the tiptop and outermost branches; our older selves. But we are also the creatures that call the tree home, as well the caretakers that promote the tree’s optimal growth and beauty.
There can be days, weeks, and even years when it feels like we are just growing slowly; waving gently in the breeze while birds and squirrels cavort in the branches. It occasionally rains or gentle winds cause leaves to drop to the base to become compost, fertilizing the roots and creating more growth. Just as it should be.
But sometimes, life brings heavy storms. The passing of a loved one, divorce, losing friends, or members of our tribe, financial crisis, natural disasters, and moving can all be examples of these storms. These times inevitably suck major testes, but thi is where things can get also really interesting in a wonderful, awful sort of way.
Those hurricane-force winds begin shaking not only our branches but the trunk itself, causing what may feel like our entire network of leaves and small branches to fall to the base of our tree.
This upheaval can begin to clog our roots. If we have unresolved childhood trauma, the emotional, energetic and psychic blocks that this can cause will compound the problem.
These upheavals can be such a frightening experience. As a result, all too often, we take on the persona of the birds and squirrels, retreating to the topmost branches or hovering above where it may feel safer but creates even more emotional distance from our root system.
When we spend too much time in this place, we may become so disconnected from our foundation that our root system begins to suffocate and rot. If we allow this to continue, we succumb to emotional and physical illness, aging before our time, and a host of other ailments that ultimately, keep us from living our best possible lives.
But if we remain present through the process – and connected to our inner caretaker – he will wade into the compost and get to work freeing up the root system to create space; aeration of that heavy load of decaying matter, allowing it to become a kickass fertilizer that supercharges our health and growth, allowing us to become the fullest, most beautiful expression of who we are meant to be.
But let’s be frank. Who really wants to wade into a swamp of fertilizer? It stinks. It’s thick and sludgy and difficult. 💩
Self-growth is damned hard, sometimes. Oftentimes. Most times.😬
For me, when those inevitable “storms” come, as they have, hard and fast, in the past couple of years, “doing the work“ often looks like hours of insomnia in the middle of the night, where my mind insists that I process through much of that fertilizer, both past and present. It sucks.
Of course, I have the choice of drinking myself into a stupor, taking a sleeping pill to avoid the 3 AM wake up call or just telling my caretaker to get lost (or f#ck off).
It often feels like it would be much easier to take on the Persona of the squirrels and birds, looking down at the narsty mire clogging my roots with a “hellllll naw” attitude. 😳
But here’s where the wonderful part comes in.
When I make the commitment to face the fears, insecurities, anxieties, and past trauma, I experience revelation that allows me to free up some of the space closest to my foundation, enabling not only better growth, but also a feeling of lightness and freedom that wasn’t there when I went to bed. I also often get the opportunity to meet lost aspects of myself that I didn’t even know existed, creating greater integration into the fullness of who I am. (if you are interested in learning more about this, check out IFS therapy. It’s powerful stuff.)
I may have gone to bed feeling bound and heavy, but by the time I have gotten up, had a cup of coffee, and done a little more processing of my nocturnal “work”, it feels like my branches are widespread, open, and shimmering gloriously in the morning light.
I would like you to also experience this revelation in the times when life feels difficult. You are a beautiful, amazing being of light and deserve to feel happy as often as possible, even when life hits you with challenging storms.
It may not be easy. But babe, you are worth the effort.
Charlie Brown, in the comic strip Peanuts, expressed it perfectly – What if today, we were just grateful for everything?
Better yet, what if every day, we were grateful for everything? What if we were grateful for every single experience life has or is bringing to us?
This may seem like a strange way to think. Why would we be grateful for all of the negative or even awful things that we experience in this life?
It can be so easy to regret and lament past decisions and the “negative” experiences life has brought to us. But this can keep us in a negative loop – holding “victim mentality”, and inhibiting our abilities as creators.
So what if instead we learned to be grateful for it all? What if we viewed all of the negative experiences of our past as opportunities for growth – to gain wisdom, to learn greater compassion, to experience the contrast of those things that don’t work for us to better know those things that do?
What if we considered the possibility that we came to this life as spirit, ready to be born into flesh to learn those lessons and to fully experience every single aspect of life from the sunsets to the sh#t on our shoe?
You may be reading this and rolling your eyes, thinking that I am being a wide-eyed idealist rather than a realist. What could possibly be the motivation to be thankful for the sh#t on our shoe or any other “crappy” experience life throws our way? (pun intended )
Would you reconsider if I told you being grateful not only increases life quality, overall happiness, physical and emotional health but also builds a better brain and significantly fatter wallet?
I thought that might catch your attention. Read on…
Dr. Laurie Santos, Professor of Psychology and creator of the wildly popular “Happiness Lab” at Yale University, teaches that gratitude is one of the key factors of happiness – and science is backing up this previously “woo woo” theory. In her course “Psychology and The Good Life” (most popular course at Yale in 300 years) she teaches much of that science.
For example, it has been shown in research that when we feel grateful, our brain produces greater concentrations of dopamine; a feel-good neurotransmitter. That dopamine increases when we express that gratitude through writing, speech, or compassionate action.
Gratitude also increases creativity and performance – professor SONJA LYUBOMIRSKY,, author of The How of Happiness, conducted an 8-month study of happiness at Harvard University. The results of this study showed that when a daily gratitude and affirmation practice was used, people were 19% more productive, analytic problem solving increased by 29%, and here’s the really cool one – revenue was increased by 36%. { Sheldon & Lyubomirsky, 2004, 2006a, 2007}
Crazy, right?
So what if we woke each day feeling happy, energized and ready to set intentions for an amazing day? And on those days that weren’t quite as amazing, what if we were grateful for the contrast – and even more so the ability to wake tomorrow and try again?
What if we made the conscious decision to begin to overlay those old subconscious programs of lack and negativity with something better?
What if we started a gratitude practice each and every day, in which we spent just a few minutes writing or really feeling into the space of gratefulness?
What if we wrote letters to our loved ones expressing all the things we appreciate about them?
What if we wrote a letter to ourselves expressing all the amazing things we loved and appreciated about us? Can you think of five things off the top of your head that you love and appreciate about yourself? 🤔
I’ve had a morning gratitude/affirmation journaling/meditation practice for several years now and I can tell you that not only do I feel better and more joyful – even in the times of intense stress – but my day flows better and I am able to create and manifest just about anything I can put my mind to.
Some days I like to “supercharge” this practice with a “handsa” – I write my daily affirmation on my palm to come back to throughout the day. Today’s handsa is “As my heart fully opens, my mind expands and that space is effortlessly filled with wisdom, freedom, joy, and abundance.” But there are days where I keep it super simple, too – “Big Juicy Life”, “I Create” “I am love” or “I hold myself in the space of”: (gratitude, joy, contentment, prosperity,etc.)
How can you make space each day for gratitude? What would a daily practice look like to you if you knew being in a place of optimism and gratefulness would absolutely improve the quality of your life?
To be totally involved in anything, let alone everything can be a struggle. We tend to base our present and future actions upon our past experiences, and unfortunately, our past experiences are often linked to pain.
We have all experienced loss in love/family/friendship relationships, jobs or business opportunities, health, pets, or any number of circumstances that have set our neurological programming to “stay away”.
Those programs are there to protect us, right? If we burn our hand on an open flame or hot stove, next time we will exercise caution – so of course our brain tells us that it should be no different with other experiences in life.
We get jilted or broken by a relationship or lover – or two – and we become reluctant to love fully. Or at all.
Someone we think is a friend rejects us and we begin to assume this is going to be the case with all friendships. So we shut down – but loneliness is a poor substitute for the joy we often find in good company and community, my love.
We close shop on our dream business or get fired/laid off from a job we enjoy through no fault of our own – and we start thinking “maybe it’s me”. Or we begin to wonder if we are truly worthy of achieving our dreams or having the financial abundance that we desire.
We fail with that first art piece, poetry, novel, or gourmet meal, and instead of giving it a second, third, fourth or even fifth go, decide that it’s “just not for us”. Can you relate? 👀
We acclimate to allow our past pain to dictate our future experience. Our world gets smaller as we start to try to control every aspect of our lives in an attempt to keep us from more pain – it would seem that those same neurological programs that are created and there to keep us from physical harm (to ensure our best chance for survival) also control our emotional well being.
But if those same programs also keep us from living fully and joyfully, it might be time to overlay some new programs and ways of being.
If you aren’t feeling like you are living the full, rich, juicy life you were created for, it might be time to give up the self-limiting illusion of control, stop saying “maybe tomorrow” and start saying “yes”.
Or better still, say “ Hellllll Yeah” to those opportunities that come your way.
Say hell yeah and jump eyes, heart and arms wide open off that ledge – and into the waiting arms of Source and All That Is. Sadhguru called it “Life”, but this is just another word for Source. When we give up control and take that leap, have faith that Source has your back.
So say yes to that new love. Yes to that bakery, bookstore, crystal shop or any other business you have been dreaming of. Yes to the dream job you have been offered. Yes to the travel, yes to the poetry, yes to the art, yes to the big jammy wines or the light-on-your palette wines. Say yes the birdwatching, whale watching, boy or girl watching – whatever does it for you. Say yes to new babies and puppies, to big hugs and long embraces, yes to conversations with strangers, to new coffee shops, pick-up games of beach volleyball, bowling or tree climbing (even if you think you might suck)
Say yes to new adventures. Or misadventures 😉, as long as it’s fun.
Say yes to that sexy new neighbor with the fabulous French accent. Or Spanish, Romanian, or no accent at all. But say yes, babe. In fact, just say yes to anything that points you in the general direction of bliss, of a feeling of ease within yourself and the fullest expansion of who you are. It just might be the best thing you ever did.
Is it possible that if you dive right in you might get hurt again? Of course. But we heal, and every single experience teaches us something about ourselves, our world and others, right? So it’s never wasted.
And I can guarantee from personal experience, once you do jump off that cliff and into the waiting arms of Source, you will never, ever want to go back to that place of lack, of allowing the past to dictate the future.
It’s a brave new world, my love. If you are receiving this message, know that this is your time to take that leap into the unknown – and into the waiting arms of Source, of Love, of bliss, of expansion and authenticity.
I can’t wait to see all that the future holds for you. I know it’s going to be absolutely magical.✨Much love, beautiful.
We’ve all heard the adage “Fake it until you make it”.
This advice can help us to get to the place that we want to be – or cause an emotional trainwreck if we aren’t being honest about where we currently are at the same time.
Does this sound like a bit of a contradiction? 🤔
In simple terms, we are creatures of habit. Our brains are vast fields of neurological pathways, and these pathways are the tracks for our physiological, emotional and psychological patterns, conscious and subconscious.
The route we take to go to work each day is a pathway. The apple oatmeal and black coffee that we enjoy for breakfast each morning. The way we respond to our partner, parents or friends when we are joyful and excited – or feeling criticized and devalued. Our habits of industriousness or sloth. Our temperament, routines and rituals, tendency to isolate or our extroverted qualities, the way we value others – or ourselves.
All of these and every other thing we do and think are pathways through the dense field that is our mind and brain matter.
This is good news because it means when it comes to pulling ourselves out of the mud to begin the trek to the top of the mountain – that place of expansive views, joy, connection and the deliberate creation of our best possible life – it is, more than anything, just an action that we continue practicing until it becomes a habit.
In the same way that we learn and improve when we practice the piano, painting, a new profession or study habit, picking ourselves up out of the mud to move on to something better after a period of grief, depression, anger or inertia is essentially the same mental action as picking up that paintbrush, textbook or laptop to prune old programs and replace them with new habits and neurological subroutines.
It might feel uncomfortable, difficult or challenging to begin, but once we practice envisioning a new reality for ourselves – or maybe a new identity would be more appropriate – and we begin to act upon what it is that we wish to see and become, eventually, that vision becomes our new way of being – our new reality.
Imagine • Practice • Do • Become
So what is it, ultimately, that you would like your life to look like in six months? A year? Three years? Five years?
How would you like to see your personal reality unfold? What would your close relationships look like?
Where would you like to live? Do you see yourself in a villa by the ocean, living in an urban setting – or maybe a tiny cabin in the woods?
What would you see yourself doing for a living – what do you think or feel that your purpose is?
What would your income be?
What would you imagine your daily habits being? Do you go to the gym or run each morning, do you meditate, or sleep in until 10?
How will you change your life? Whatever you can envision, you can achieve.✨😎
Let me give you an example from a friend/client of mine:
“Rebecca” grew up in a dysfunctional home. She was taught that her value was in what she did rather than who she was and it was best if she was “seen and not heard”.
So of course, Rebecca grew up to behave in ways that reflected this value system.
She neglected her own well being. She put all of her energy into caring for others. She withdrew when there was conflict or when she was emotionally uncomfortable.
She topically believed she had successful relationships, all the while avoiding real intimacy.
Eventually Rebecca found herself depressed. She assumed it was just the “pressures of life” and took antidepressants – but while it seemed like she wasn’t really depressed and unable to function anymore, she still didn’t feel emotionally connected to her life. 😓
In fact, she didn’t feel very emotionally connected to anything other than a growing sense of desperation and anger, emotions that she desperately tried to suppress.
Can you relate to Rebecca’s story so far?
Eventually, Rebecca began to see a counselor 🥰 who helped her look at childhood patterns that were causing huge blocks in her ability to experience joy, to value herself, to adapt and evolve – and how those patterns were reflected in her current relationships.
She spent some time grieving for the many years she had neglected to care for the physical and emotional needs and wellness of herself and her inner child as a result of those patterns.
She learned to reset her vibrational field to allow good to come to her rather than repelling her wishes and dreams due to her subset programs of scarcity and lack of value.
She discovered that she had to learn to self-care and nurture her personal growth, set healthy boundaries with others, and began to prune some of the toxic people who couldn’t accept her boundaries, growth and the radical responsibility for the shaping of her personal reality. This was a process that was deeply painful but also deeply cathartic.
Fast forward three years. Rebecca is living the life that she hadn’t realized she was missing. She has a truly successful relationship with a partner who enjoys healthy dialogue and honest communication. This honesty also means intimacy and she understands what real vulnerability and intimacy means.
She has taken up several hobbies that had interested her in childhood and although she reports that it is sometimes frustrating to not be “better” than she is, she loves the process of learning and slowly gaining skill.
She had quit her corporate job a couple of years back, and now works largely from home contracting her skills to large companies. She loves the freedom this gives her.
She also makes it a point to spend time with friends and family each week to recreate and build personal relationships.
In short, she has radically turned her life around.
Rebecca still has occasional days when she feels a little blue. But knowing that feeling connected, happy and deliberately creating her life is just so much better, she gives herself some grace and space to deeply feel on those days, but also keeps envisioning an ever-expanding future – and joyfully continues to expand into that future.
And you know what? Rebecca’s blue days will become less and less the more she practices bliss, curating and cultivating the life of her dreams, healthy communication and community with others and most importantly, loving herself into wholeness. How cool is that?
If Rebecca’s story resonates with you, I’d love to hear your story, too. How do you lift yourself from the mud after those days that you need to give yourself a little more grace and space to feel deeply and acknowledge those past parts of yourself that might still feel a little broken?
What habits do you practice that keep your vision clear and ever-expanding and your vibrational field humming at a frequency that allows good to come to you – rather than repelling it with hidden subconscious programs?
Drop me a comment below!⬇️☺️
And just in case you needed to be reminded today, you are amazing. You are valuable. You are a magnificent creation and capable of achieving anything you can dream of, and babe, you are so very loved.🥰
If our thoughts produce emotions and emotions are resonance – and resonance/vibration is the language of the universe, what language are you speaking to Source?
When we ask for the outflow of our best possible life from a place of lack, anger, fear or other negative emotional states, it is impossible for Source to grant that reality because Good can’t be created from the building blocks of lack.
It’s like asking your mom to bake a decadent chocolate cake when all you supply her with is white flour. 👩🍳🧁🤷♀️
This might seem like a simplified metaphor but the idea is exactly the same. Good out, better back.
If you aren’t sure of how to create your highest vibe, start with gratitude – but don’t just list out those things you value.
What’s really important is that you practice feeling the joy of those things. From that place of higher resonance you can begin the process of co-creating the life of your dreams.
The next step is to look at the deeper held beliefs that might be holding you back or creating blocks to your best reality.
It’s estimated that a whopping 70-80% of us experience childhood abuse or trauma that greatly contribute to a negative subconscious state of mind.
What are the subconscious programs of lack of worth and value that may have been running since childhood that contradict what you want to experience in real time?
Here are some questions that can help you to understand whether or not you are asking for chocolate cake but putting out white refined flour, borrowed from Greg Baden’s book “The Spontaneous Healing of Belief”:
These questions target the heart of what we believe we deserve.
In the book, the author goes on to speak of the “Great Question” as our fundamental belief in the contrast of good and evil (good loves us, evil wants our destruction) in the world or the idea that there is One Source (that has our best interest at heart) from which everything stems.
A very interesting question indeed, but regardless of which side of the fence you might stand on, I believe that realizing your essential sense of value and worth is 💯 crucial to the co-creation of an amazing, magical reality.
What you resonate, you draw to you.
Let me repeat that in a different way because this is the most important fundamental law of the universe:
What you vibrate, you create.
This is true of attracting money, a mate, the car of your dreams or a rusted out hulk, a home, health and vibrancy or illness and fatigue… and everything else under the sun.
Let’s say “Josh” wishes to manifest his dream career opening a travel agency but those inner voices (subconscious programs) tell him that it is safer to stay in the soul-sucking corporate job he’s been at for the last ten years, or that he will surely fail if he tries something different. Or maybe he doesn’t deserve to have a career that makes him happy and makes good money too.
Sad, right? 🥺
What do you think the odds are that Josh will ever see his dream become a reality? Probably pretty low unless he begins to re-write those programs to create a better reality.
We can take the same formula to everything in our lives. What partners do we tend to attract over and over? (What did your parents, family and social groups teach you that you deserved?)
How many times have we failed at our diet or getting in shape? (Do you really see yourself as you want to be?)
I know it might be painful to look at these lessons, babe. Change is rarely easy and often hard AF. But believe me, so very worth it.
You are worth it. ✨
Affirmations, vision boards, mantra and meditation are all great ways to begin overwriting those patterns of lack. Therapy can be pretty amazing, too.🥰
There are also many wonderful resources on YouTube for guided meditations that can help facilitate the process, too.
I especially like “Power Thoughts Meditation Club which combines powerful binaural beats with positive affirmations. Here’s one example:
For now, if you haven’t begun a daily gratitude practice, it’s a perfect place to start getting yourself into that higher vibrational state, and there’s no better time than the present to begin.💫
Today I am grateful for so many things – a lovely sunset stroll with a good friend, cold drinks and live music on a Saturday night, good coffee, an amazing meditation and relaxed morning, my happy pups…but family and friends top my list.
What’s on your list today? Are you holding the ingredients for a decadent chocolate cake aka an amazing reality in your field – or dusty white flour? 🤗
She represents fire, lightning, dance, wind, volcanoes and violence. Her poetic name is Ka wahine `ai honua or the woman who devours the land.
She is both a creator and destroyer. She erupts and the world quakes as she pours lava onto land and sea – but from that destruction new life forms.
Soil grows over mineral-rich lava, lush life begins to put roots into that soil and eventually, paradise is created.
As part of my morning time with Source, I read spiritual and self-development books and sometimes consult different “wisdom cards” that nearly always provide the guidance or comfort I need on a particular day.
This card of the Goddess Pele came up in my reading this morning, and wow, did it hit home.
I am in a time of upheaval in nearly every aspect of my life at the moment, and to be honest, it often just feels like chaos.
As I write, I am two thirds or so through a remodel of my home – largely on my own. I’m a handy-with-the-tools kinda gal, but I’ve also been incredibly grateful for the occasional help of good friends along the way.
Right now I have flooring torn up and paint halfway done as I prepare to lay new floors. I have furniture upended and shoved wherever there is room in order to have the spaces cleared that I need to lay the wood and carpets.
My personal life has been in a similar situation for some time too, which means I am feeling a little like Pele dumped a mountain of lava over a few acres of my everything.
“Elements” by Catherine Langwagen
Not a fun place to be.
But this card is the perfect reminder that from chaos and destruction new life is formed. Though aspects of my life have been razed, I know that spectacular new life is forming and growing, just beneath the surface.
When I’m centered in my heart, I can feel that growth, alive and so ready to burst forth into the sun.
But I’m not always there, and there are moments where all that I can see is the chaos. In those moments, I start to panic.
But I keep going back to Source, and I keep getting these wonderful reminders that right here is where I am supposed to be in order for my life to grow fully into where I want and need to be.
These reminders help me to come back into my heart-centered space. That space where I can feel excitement for the process of creation and for all that is to come.
Can you relate? Have you been in that place of destruction, when you look out onto the landscape of your life and just think “oh, sh#t.”?
That sh#t is fertilizer that will feed the new growth.
If you are there right now, babe, you are 💯 not alone. I’ve got your back. We will get through it, together .
I am so excited to stand with you as we look at the glorious dawn of new creation when the chaos is tamed and we are surrounded by light and lush growth, bursting through the fertilizer-rich soil of Pele’s destruction.
Have faith that it’s coming, beauty. I feel it. I know it.
Can you feel it, too?
Whether you are in the midst of a cycle of despair and destruction or feeling your new growth, I see you. You are amazing, capable and you have so got this.
When we are in the midst of a difficult situation, the last thing we want to hear is some well-meaning person telling us “there is a reason for everything”, right?
But what if we just re-framed our suffering a little? What if we looked at those difficulties as a way to bring us closer to the wholeness we might have been missing before?
What if all of life was happening for us, not to us, and that in the karmic/grand scheme of things we are here to learn to re-structure who we are despite our circumstances to become the greatest possible version of ourselves? 🤔
Painting is one of the ways I express my need to create. Probably because of this, I’ve always liked to think of life as a spectacular, massive painting.
Have you ever been in front of an art piece so large that you could only take in small portions when you were up close?
Let’s say that someone puts you right in front of just such a painting.
What you see directly before you is a big stroke of dark grey or even black paint. It makes you feel a little sad.
But when you step back, you realize that that stroke of dark paint was the pupil of the most amazing set of eyes you have ever seen.
You step back even further to realize that the painting is of a beautiful woman reclining beside a still lake, perhaps smiling up at someone she loves. The sun is shining and the sky is blue with small grey clouds behind distant mountains.
Poignant, right? When we are right in front of our adversities it is so very challenging to remember that what we are experiencing is dark but necessary portion of a much larger story, and the overarching story is a breathtaking work of art. Like you.💕✨
If you are one of those people who are in the middle of something challenging or even heartbreaking right now, I see you, and am sending so much love.
Breathe, allow the experience – and whatever emotions might come with it.
But also remember that life is an ever-unfolding painting, and when you are able to create some space between yourself and what you are going through, you will see how your challenges provided contrast to make a truly magnificent piece of art.
“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson
Good morning, gorgeous;
How do you feel about you, today and everyday?
Do you feel gloriously, beautifully, authentically yourself, or do you struggle with self-doubt?
Feeling amazing about who you are is 💯 a vital step in learning to create an inspiring life, but for many, it’s difficult to know how to be ourselves in a world that wants us to conform rather than express, to hide rather than shine.
Wear this not that.
Fit this size not that one.
Wear your long. Wear your hair short. Wear your hair parted in the middle or you’re unstylish and ugly.
Wear Birks. High waisted jeans. No, low waisted pants. Converse.
Go vegan. Paleo. Keto.
And a thousand other trends, fads, and “rules of conformity” that are thrown at us every single day.
It’s frustrating, isn’t it?😕
But babe, here’s a little secret for you, and a hard truth of reality: if you are trying to be cool by being like everyone else, you probably aren’t.
If you are a Lion trying to be a lamb – or a lamb trying to be a Lion – that skin just isn’t going to look right on you no matter how hard you try.🤷♀️
So maybe it’s time to just be what you are and embrace that muthafookin’ Lion-ness – or lamb-ness and be yourself.
You can begin this process by starting to notice what makes you feel excited, happy, or even curious.
Flip through some magazines. Browse Pinterest. Go window shopping for clothing and home decor ideas. This should be an individual process to avoid being influenced by well-meaning friends or family.
Write down what you observe or create a vision board.
In fact, 💯 create a vision board and remember to look at that when you wake and before bed, the times of day that your brain is in an alpha or theta brain state and at its best for creation.
What speaks to you, personally?
What lights you up?
Do you love rainbows and unicorns, boho chic, lit b#tch, nature goddess/god or goth with a moody vibe – or combination of all of the above?
There don’t have to be rules here. It’s all about what feels amazing to you.
Those things and folks that vibe with your soul and resonate on a deep level – whether style, home decor, music, travel, your tribe or anything else under the sun – these are the things that speak of your authentic self just waiting to reveal itself.
These are the lamps that are there to light your way to a happier, inspired – and inspiring – life.
So if you are feeling ready to stop living in the shadows of everyone else and step into the light of your own spectacular authenticity, get out there and start creating, babe.
Tune into your vibe and your tribe and find your most authentic self. And most importantly, have fun!🥳
And just in case you needed to hear it today, you are magnificent – and I love you!💖
What is the emotion you currently experience most right now?
If you are feeling stuck in old patterns of being that you can see but can’t seem to change, this one question can lead you to the answer as to why you may be in the mud instead of on the mountaintop.
If your answer is that the primary emotional state you experience is in any negative emotion such as anger, resentment, anxiety, sadness or frustration, this is exactly what is keeping you where you are rather than where you want to be.
We can not create a positive life from a negative state of mind. This isn’t just a cute saying – this is science. Here are a few of the negative consequences to the body and mind when we are habituated to negativity:
The brain signals the body to produce neurochemicals such as cortisol and adrenaline. These are 💯 necessary for short-term flight-or-fight situations, but when they are circulating in our system long term, they can wreak havoc on our immune system, cardiovascular and neurological function. Long term stress can also trigger DNA markers for genetic disease and shorten telomeres; markers for aging and health, making us old far before our time.
Stress hormones and chemicals can literally become an addiction . When we allow stress to become habitual we learn to depend on the hit of adrenaline and cortisol every time we create drama or stress for ourselves.
Our magnetic field becomes smaller as we draw from it to sustain the increase in stress on our physical functions, decreasing our energy and vitality.
We carry information on our physical and emotional state in our bodies, minds and magnetic field. This information is transmitted to those around us as well as into the quantum field, and remember that what we transmit, we also receive, creating a cycle of lack and unhappiness.
Obviously, none of us want to be creating more unhappiness for ourselves, right? Though our subconscious programming might be preventing it, ultimately, most of us want to be happy.
We were born to be creators. And who wouldn’t rather create a life of vitality, beauty and meaning versus one of dis-ease, unhappiness and lack?
If you can recognize that you are in a chronically negative state, you should be able to begin pruning those neural networks that are no longer serving your highest self to begin creating new networks and neurological programs that reflect the reality you wish to see.
An essential aspect of pruning old neural networks and building a new, healthier mindset is training your body’s biology to reflect the emotional reality you want to create. Our bodies are capable of creating thousands of chemicals that can be used for healing and happiness – or for sickness, anxiety and depression.
You are capable of moving mountains and creating any reality you can imagine, but in order to get there you must first overcome those pre-set blocks that might be keeping you from living your best life.
What are you trying to manifest in your life right now? Greater abundance? A limitless mind? Healing of sickness – or just an optimally functioning body? An amazing relationship? The career of your dreams?
Here is the #1 key to training the mind and body to move past those barriers, build new neural networks and step into greater abundance, health, relationship – into living a life of beauty and meaning:
You have to feel it.
Now your first response to this might be “well duh, genius. We’ve talked about this before. Obviously we need to feel good to create good, right?” 🤔
But the truth is, it’s easier said than done.
It requires us to look within to find those blocks that we might not even realize are there, keeping us from the life that we desire.
It requires us taking accountability for the life we have created to this point, which can be deeply painful – and then we have to begin rebuilding ourselves to reflect something new. Which can also be difficult – but also incredibly rewarding.
If you are unsure of what blocks might be holding you back, here is a tool that will help you on your journey: a Visualization/Feeling meditation.
Sit comfortably with your back straight. Allow your mind to become quiet. Breathe deeply into your diaphragm. Try to keep your mind’s focus on your breath, at first. Take as long as you need to quiet the mind’s chatter. When you have found that place where it feels like floating in space – being nowhere, nothing; formless, ask yourself to feel the following:
Abundance. What does it feel like to be abundant, to have all of your needs met, all the time? What might abundance look like in your life? Can you feel a sense of abundance not only in your mind but in your body?
Fearless. Can you imagine – and feel the experience of being completely without fear – of having faith that you can achieve anything and Source/Spirit will have your back? What might you do or try that fear has held you from up to this point? Riding a motorcycle? Pursuing a new career or a newly single high school crush? Try to envision whatever it is fully, making it a sensory experience…. For me, cliff jumping is one of those experiences I can easily bring up to feel fearlessness – the adrenaline rush of looking down to the water far below and the weightlessness of space as I jump and begin falling. The cold water as it hits my feet then my whole body as I am submerged before swimming to the surface, exhilarated and refreshed….
Limitless. This should feel similar to fearlessness but try to come into the feeling state of your own limitless ability. How would it change you if you could do anything, be anyone, think like a genius?
Wealthy. What does this feel like to you? Can you envision having unlimited resources to go anywhere, do anything, help any number of people? Where would you go? What would you do? How would you be different than you are right now? Can you feel what it would be like to be truly wealthy – to have zero lack?
Joy. Can you put yourself in the feeling state of bliss? Can you feel happy not only in your mind, but in every cell of your body? Can you feel joy in your heart?
Perfect health. Try to feel vibrant health resonating in your entire body and mind.
Relationship/love. What type of relationships do you most desire to create? What does having a wonderful relationship with and being deeply valued by a lover, spouse, partner, children, friends, family members – or your community – feel like? Can you see yourself in your ideal situation? What might it look like? Try to be as detailed as you can as you create possibilities in your mind, allowing yourself to feel the wonderful emotions of these relationships and scenarios. This is vitally important, which I will touch on shortly.
Career/job. What would you be doing if you could do anything? Would you be a doctor, lawyer, corporate executive, spy, teacher, guru, or entrepreneur? What did you wish to be when you were a child? Can you feel into that state?
How did this meditation go? Did you get through all of these questions? Did you experience blocks or difficulty on any of them? Most of us have blocks In several of these areas. We are often trained from an early age by our parental figures to be limited or that we lack ability and value.
This is a false bill of goods and deeply unfortunate. We will never create an ideal world as long as we continue to teach our children that they are flawed and limited.😤
The good news is, these blocks show you the first part of your roadmap to a better reality. If you experienced a block when you asked yourself to be wealthy, or fearless, or have the relationship of your dreams, you know what programs need to be overlayed with new programs and patterns.
Which takes us back to visualization and feeling the way that we want to be. When we put our minds and bodies into a cohesive feeling state, we are not only creating greater health, but we are training ourselves to live in the future reality that we want to see rather than the past reality that has been holding us back.
We are also creating a magnetic and vibrational field that resonates to those around us and the quantum field, where Source can most readily bring us those components that we need to create the reality of our dreams.
If you experienced blocks in your ability to come into a feeling state from the exercise above, let’s go back and take each trait or emotion individually.
When you are ready, find your comfortable seated position. Begin with the first question you experienced difficulty with. Let’s say it was relationship – a hard one for most of us. Likely because of their own issues, our parents taught us that we were not valuable.
As a result, often without even realizing it, we behave in ways that perpetuate this belief in our adult relationships:
We don’t keep our word to those around us.
We let ourselves and others down or don’t always behave with honesty and integrity.
We speak to our loved ones in ways that are harmful.
We may find ourselves drawn to cheating on our partners – though we don’t want our primary relationship to end.
We shut down when it comes to communication.
And a host of other dysfunctional behaviors that keep us – and our loved ones -unhappy and perpetuating the belief that we lack value.
Ouch, right?🥵.
But here’s where we can transform those dysfunctional past subconscious programs into something so much greater and begin building the life and personality/personal reality that we wish to see rather than hating the person that we think we are.
Let’s say in our personal relationships we have a tendency to be short tempered and resentful, and our communication skills are lacking.
From your place of meditation, visualize a loving relationship with a partner in which you sit across from them, holding hands as you easily talk about those issues in your relationship that need work. Feel your heart center completely open, radiating light and warmth in this visualization.
(In a post a couple of weeks back, I spoke of heart coherence. This visualization will create coherence in your heart and mind not only in this moment, but in future moments as you experience this in reality.).
Feel the love and acceptance of your partner as you create a greater reality together. Hold yourself in this space for as long as you are able. The longer you are able to sustain coherence in meditation, the more you will experience it in everyday life.
Use this basic formula for each quality you wish to embody.
This may feel difficult at first. Remember that you are overlaying programs that have been there for many years and it will not feel comfortable the first time or even the first few times you practice, but you will notice that the more often you practice this meditation and visualization, the easier it will become.
From there, you will begin to see what may feel like miracles unfolding as these new neural networks draw into your reality exactly what you wish for.
This seemingly miraculous creation of new realities is a combination of new neural wiring and firing causing a release of A)different chemical messengers into the brain and body, B)accessing new possibilities in the quantum field, and C) our RAS (remember the Reticular Activating System; the brain’s “reality filter”? Someone mentions a red Fiat and suddenly we see five red Fiats on the freeway that we wouldn’t have noticed before) beginning to allow us to observe and draw to us new aspects of our everyday reality that we wouldn’t have seen with our old wiring and programs. Amazing stuff, right?🤩
Wherever you are, beloved, I hope you will read this and be inspired to become a conscious creator and reality shaper rather than a victim of past neurological programming. You deserve to be happy. You deserve to be fulfilled. You deserve to have your deepest desires and greatest wishes achieved. I believe in you, and I love you, always. 💖
In this final part of this series, I’m going to give you the formula – and the practices that will take you from Woe to Wow. From dis-ease to ease.
To begin, let’s go back to our core belief systems for a moment to discuss how it relates to Personality = Personal Reality. Our Personality is created largely through our Personal Belief System, and our Personal Belief System creates our reality.
Here’s the basic formula for how we create our reality each day:
CBS + T + E/F +B + H = E/R
Core Belief System (CBS) = Thoughts = Emotions/Feelings/Frequencies =
Behaviors = Habits = Experience (Results)
Let’s break that down:
Our Core Belief System, those neurological patterns and programs that began to be established in early childhood, tend to keep us running in a subconscious loop that are based upon our past experience.
If as children we lived in a home where lack was the norm, it will be difficult to move past the idea that we live in a reality of lack.
Our Beliefs will perpetuate the thoughts and emotions of lack. (How many times do parents say “we can’t afford this. We are broke” Or “we will buy you the cheaper version of what you really want.” These words create our reality and personal sense of value as children.)
Those thoughts and emotions of lack will create behaviors that reflect our beliefs. The emotions/feelings of our Core Beliefs cause our brain and body to create neurochemicals. These can either create physical dis-ease and dysfunction, lowered immune system and a host of other symptoms or greater health, or increased immune function and energy and well-being, depending on whether our thoughts and emotions are positive or negative.
They also create our behaviors and habits – I have a little extra cash in our pocket. Because I believe I live in a state of lack, I spend it on some trinket – rather than saving and eventually investing in a healthy future. The results of these habits of course just reinforce our initial belief – I spent all of my money and I am in lack again. I will always be in lack. And so we are…
Or another example – My parents taught me that I am clumsy. As an adult, I am constantly falling on stairs, dropping dishes, etc. because I believe I am clumsy. Falling on the stairs or dropping dishes confirms that Core Belief, putting us into vibrational alignment, which creates more similar experiences.
If we grew up in an environment where our personal reality was abundance, our pre-set programming for continuing to thrive in an environment of abundance is greater. We will never feel a sense of lack and our behaviors and habits will reflect that.
Of course, there are different types of lack and abundance beyond the material. If our family was wealthy but lacked emotional intelligence or love, we will still be more likely to live a life of lack as adults. Conversely, if we had parents that were financially lacking but loving and supportive emotionally, our capacity for thriving in an environment of abundance as adults is much greater.
It is important to note that if we experienced childhood or adolescent trauma, our ability to create a life that reflects high personal value will be less, as well.
This being said, we have to look at a new formula for creating the life we wish to see:
Access/Acknowledge CBS + Reprogram thoughts/Shift emotions + Alignment (Establish behaviors & habits to reflect new reality)+ Behaviors/Habits = Results/Reality
In order to create a new reality for ourselves, we have to access and acknowledge the source of our limiting beliefs. What lines have you drawn in the sand without realizing it – where are those boundaries of belief and what is the origin/source? What are the thoughts and feelings that accompany these beliefs?
Once we have accessed those beliefs and memories that are perpetuating our subconscious programming, we can begin to reprogram the mind.
Ask yourself how you would like to expand the boundaries you had previously created for yourself, likely without even realizing you had drawn those lines in the sand? Visualize wiping those lines away.
Write it down! What do you want to see in your future reality? Vision boards are a great way to create greater clarity in visualization.
A vital aspect of beginning to move into that future reality is the emotional vibration of it. Can you imagine yourself there? How does it feel?
For example – If you have a dream of living in the Caribbean, see yourself on the beach.
Feel the warmth of the sand between your toes, cool trade breezes dancing off your skin. See the crystal-clear turquoise of the water before you. Imagine your beautiful plantation-style home behind you, surrounded by tall palms and lush greenery.
I love the feeling of being on a motorcycle. While I don’t currently own one, I often go back to the feeling visualization of racing through long country roads, green trees rushing past. Or the wind buffeting my face as I cruise along the California coastline, tall madronas on towering cliffs above the wild Pacific ocean.
What future reality would you like to see for yourself? It works, believe me. I’ve easily manifested sports cars, homes, amazing vacations around the world, vintage campers… and as just a few examples. Remove your limits and start visualizing!
Clear your mind. Get quiet. Imagine the version of you/reality you wish to see at a distance of say, half a mile away. Now begin to move in a straight line towards that point. Feel into that space. Feel the joy there. Feel the possibility there. Feel the excitement in that space.
Try to remain in this mindstate for as long as possible. The longer and more often we can sustain this higher frequency state, the faster we will notice the fulfillment and manifestation of that reality. But if you can’t quite get there all the time, give yourself love and grace. Go back to that one happy thought that can get you closer to that future self.
Next we need to create habits and behaviors that reflect the personality – personal reality – we want to see.
A habit of presence and gratitude is an essential component in creating a better reality. Remember that heart coherence creates a healthier body and mind and a vibrational resonance that we send out into the world around us and the quantum realm/Source frequency.
Desire/Ask/Believe/Receive – But what is the vibration in which you are asking? Tuning in to where our mind is frequently and keeping a daily gratitude journal will help keep our energetic frequencies and neurochemicals vital, healthy and happy.
Create a daily habit of movement and nourishment. How you move is up to you, but daily exercise keeps both mind and body healthier and in a higher vibrational state.
Find those other habits and behaviors that reflect the reality you are creating.
Do you want to become an artist? Paint! Take classes. Experiment with different forms of media and components.
A writer? Write every damned day, even if it’s only for a few minutes.
Do you want to open a small (or big) business? Look into an LLC and a business plan.
Whatever your dream, try to come back to the state of being that future self (personality) holds as much as possible. Remember that we are looking for alignment with that ideal reality/personal reality. A good mantra is simply the question: Am I aligned?
From this place of alignment and coherence, watch the miracles begin to unfold. I can’t wait to see what the future holds for you, beautiful one. You deserve every good thing your imagination can hold, and more!
This Blessed Sacred Life 