She represents fire, lightning, dance, wind, volcanoes and violence. Her poetic name is Ka wahine `ai honua or the woman who devours the land.
She is both a creator and destroyer. She erupts and the world quakes as she pours lava onto land and sea – but from that destruction new life forms.
Soil grows over mineral-rich lava, lush life begins to put roots into that soil and eventually, paradise is created.
As part of my morning time with Source, I read spiritual and self-development books and sometimes consult different “wisdom cards” that nearly always provide the guidance or comfort I need on a particular day.
This card of the Goddess Pele came up in my reading this morning, and wow, did it hit home.
I am in a time of upheaval in nearly every aspect of my life at the moment, and to be honest, it often just feels like chaos.
As I write, I am two thirds or so through a remodel of my home – largely on my own. I’m a handy-with-the-tools kinda gal, but I’ve also been incredibly grateful for the occasional help of good friends along the way.
Right now I have flooring torn up and paint halfway done as I prepare to lay new floors. I have furniture upended and shoved wherever there is room in order to have the spaces cleared that I need to lay the wood and carpets.
My personal life has been in a similar situation for some time too, which means I am feeling a little like Pele dumped a mountain of lava over a few acres of my everything.
“Elements” by Catherine Langwagen
Not a fun place to be.
But this card is the perfect reminder that from chaos and destruction new life is formed. Though aspects of my life have been razed, I know that spectacular new life is forming and growing, just beneath the surface.
When I’m centered in my heart, I can feel that growth, alive and so ready to burst forth into the sun.
But I’m not always there, and there are moments where all that I can see is the chaos. In those moments, I start to panic.
But I keep going back to Source, and I keep getting these wonderful reminders that right here is where I am supposed to be in order for my life to grow fully into where I want and need to be.
These reminders help me to come back into my heart-centered space. That space where I can feel excitement for the process of creation and for all that is to come.
Can you relate? Have you been in that place of destruction, when you look out onto the landscape of your life and just think “oh, sh#t.”?
That sh#t is fertilizer that will feed the new growth.
If you are there right now, babe, you are 💯 not alone. I’ve got your back. We will get through it, together .
I am so excited to stand with you as we look at the glorious dawn of new creation when the chaos is tamed and we are surrounded by light and lush growth, bursting through the fertilizer-rich soil of Pele’s destruction.
Have faith that it’s coming, beauty. I feel it. I know it.
Can you feel it, too?
Whether you are in the midst of a cycle of despair and destruction or feeling your new growth, I see you. You are amazing, capable and you have so got this.
When we are in the midst of a difficult situation, the last thing we want to hear is some well-meaning person telling us “there is a reason for everything”, right?
But what if we just re-framed our suffering a little? What if we looked at those difficulties as a way to bring us closer to the wholeness we might have been missing before?
What if all of life was happening for us, not to us, and that in the karmic/grand scheme of things we are here to learn to re-structure who we are despite our circumstances to become the greatest possible version of ourselves? 🤔
Painting is one of the ways I express my need to create. Probably because of this, I’ve always liked to think of life as a spectacular, massive painting.
Have you ever been in front of an art piece so large that you could only take in small portions when you were up close?
Let’s say that someone puts you right in front of just such a painting.
What you see directly before you is a big stroke of dark grey or even black paint. It makes you feel a little sad.
But when you step back, you realize that that stroke of dark paint was the pupil of the most amazing set of eyes you have ever seen.
You step back even further to realize that the painting is of a beautiful woman reclining beside a still lake, perhaps smiling up at someone she loves. The sun is shining and the sky is blue with small grey clouds behind distant mountains.
Poignant, right? When we are right in front of our adversities it is so very challenging to remember that what we are experiencing is dark but necessary portion of a much larger story, and the overarching story is a breathtaking work of art. Like you.💕✨
If you are one of those people who are in the middle of something challenging or even heartbreaking right now, I see you, and am sending so much love.
Breathe, allow the experience – and whatever emotions might come with it.
But also remember that life is an ever-unfolding painting, and when you are able to create some space between yourself and what you are going through, you will see how your challenges provided contrast to make a truly magnificent piece of art.
“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson
Good morning, gorgeous;
How do you feel about you, today and everyday?
Do you feel gloriously, beautifully, authentically yourself, or do you struggle with self-doubt?
Feeling amazing about who you are is 💯 a vital step in learning to create an inspiring life, but for many, it’s difficult to know how to be ourselves in a world that wants us to conform rather than express, to hide rather than shine.
Wear this not that.
Fit this size not that one.
Wear your long. Wear your hair short. Wear your hair parted in the middle or you’re unstylish and ugly.
Wear Birks. High waisted jeans. No, low waisted pants. Converse.
Go vegan. Paleo. Keto.
And a thousand other trends, fads, and “rules of conformity” that are thrown at us every single day.
It’s frustrating, isn’t it?😕
But babe, here’s a little secret for you, and a hard truth of reality: if you are trying to be cool by being like everyone else, you probably aren’t.
If you are a Lion trying to be a lamb – or a lamb trying to be a Lion – that skin just isn’t going to look right on you no matter how hard you try.🤷♀️
So maybe it’s time to just be what you are and embrace that muthafookin’ Lion-ness – or lamb-ness and be yourself.
You can begin this process by starting to notice what makes you feel excited, happy, or even curious.
Flip through some magazines. Browse Pinterest. Go window shopping for clothing and home decor ideas. This should be an individual process to avoid being influenced by well-meaning friends or family.
Write down what you observe or create a vision board.
In fact, 💯 create a vision board and remember to look at that when you wake and before bed, the times of day that your brain is in an alpha or theta brain state and at its best for creation.
What speaks to you, personally?
What lights you up?
Do you love rainbows and unicorns, boho chic, lit b#tch, nature goddess/god or goth with a moody vibe – or combination of all of the above?
There don’t have to be rules here. It’s all about what feels amazing to you.
Those things and folks that vibe with your soul and resonate on a deep level – whether style, home decor, music, travel, your tribe or anything else under the sun – these are the things that speak of your authentic self just waiting to reveal itself.
These are the lamps that are there to light your way to a happier, inspired – and inspiring – life.
So if you are feeling ready to stop living in the shadows of everyone else and step into the light of your own spectacular authenticity, get out there and start creating, babe.
Tune into your vibe and your tribe and find your most authentic self. And most importantly, have fun!🥳
And just in case you needed to hear it today, you are magnificent – and I love you!💖
What is the emotion you currently experience most right now?
If you are feeling stuck in old patterns of being that you can see but can’t seem to change, this one question can lead you to the answer as to why you may be in the mud instead of on the mountaintop.
If your answer is that the primary emotional state you experience is in any negative emotion such as anger, resentment, anxiety, sadness or frustration, this is exactly what is keeping you where you are rather than where you want to be.
We can not create a positive life from a negative state of mind. This isn’t just a cute saying – this is science. Here are a few of the negative consequences to the body and mind when we are habituated to negativity:
The brain signals the body to produce neurochemicals such as cortisol and adrenaline. These are 💯 necessary for short-term flight-or-fight situations, but when they are circulating in our system long term, they can wreak havoc on our immune system, cardiovascular and neurological function. Long term stress can also trigger DNA markers for genetic disease and shorten telomeres; markers for aging and health, making us old far before our time.
Stress hormones and chemicals can literally become an addiction . When we allow stress to become habitual we learn to depend on the hit of adrenaline and cortisol every time we create drama or stress for ourselves.
Our magnetic field becomes smaller as we draw from it to sustain the increase in stress on our physical functions, decreasing our energy and vitality.
We carry information on our physical and emotional state in our bodies, minds and magnetic field. This information is transmitted to those around us as well as into the quantum field, and remember that what we transmit, we also receive, creating a cycle of lack and unhappiness.
Obviously, none of us want to be creating more unhappiness for ourselves, right? Though our subconscious programming might be preventing it, ultimately, most of us want to be happy.
We were born to be creators. And who wouldn’t rather create a life of vitality, beauty and meaning versus one of dis-ease, unhappiness and lack?
If you can recognize that you are in a chronically negative state, you should be able to begin pruning those neural networks that are no longer serving your highest self to begin creating new networks and neurological programs that reflect the reality you wish to see.
An essential aspect of pruning old neural networks and building a new, healthier mindset is training your body’s biology to reflect the emotional reality you want to create. Our bodies are capable of creating thousands of chemicals that can be used for healing and happiness – or for sickness, anxiety and depression.
You are capable of moving mountains and creating any reality you can imagine, but in order to get there you must first overcome those pre-set blocks that might be keeping you from living your best life.
What are you trying to manifest in your life right now? Greater abundance? A limitless mind? Healing of sickness – or just an optimally functioning body? An amazing relationship? The career of your dreams?
Here is the #1 key to training the mind and body to move past those barriers, build new neural networks and step into greater abundance, health, relationship – into living a life of beauty and meaning:
You have to feel it.
Now your first response to this might be “well duh, genius. We’ve talked about this before. Obviously we need to feel good to create good, right?” 🤔
But the truth is, it’s easier said than done.
It requires us to look within to find those blocks that we might not even realize are there, keeping us from the life that we desire.
It requires us taking accountability for the life we have created to this point, which can be deeply painful – and then we have to begin rebuilding ourselves to reflect something new. Which can also be difficult – but also incredibly rewarding.
If you are unsure of what blocks might be holding you back, here is a tool that will help you on your journey: a Visualization/Feeling meditation.
Sit comfortably with your back straight. Allow your mind to become quiet. Breathe deeply into your diaphragm. Try to keep your mind’s focus on your breath, at first. Take as long as you need to quiet the mind’s chatter. When you have found that place where it feels like floating in space – being nowhere, nothing; formless, ask yourself to feel the following:
Abundance. What does it feel like to be abundant, to have all of your needs met, all the time? What might abundance look like in your life? Can you feel a sense of abundance not only in your mind but in your body?
Fearless. Can you imagine – and feel the experience of being completely without fear – of having faith that you can achieve anything and Source/Spirit will have your back? What might you do or try that fear has held you from up to this point? Riding a motorcycle? Pursuing a new career or a newly single high school crush? Try to envision whatever it is fully, making it a sensory experience…. For me, cliff jumping is one of those experiences I can easily bring up to feel fearlessness – the adrenaline rush of looking down to the water far below and the weightlessness of space as I jump and begin falling. The cold water as it hits my feet then my whole body as I am submerged before swimming to the surface, exhilarated and refreshed….
Limitless. This should feel similar to fearlessness but try to come into the feeling state of your own limitless ability. How would it change you if you could do anything, be anyone, think like a genius?
Wealthy. What does this feel like to you? Can you envision having unlimited resources to go anywhere, do anything, help any number of people? Where would you go? What would you do? How would you be different than you are right now? Can you feel what it would be like to be truly wealthy – to have zero lack?
Joy. Can you put yourself in the feeling state of bliss? Can you feel happy not only in your mind, but in every cell of your body? Can you feel joy in your heart?
Perfect health. Try to feel vibrant health resonating in your entire body and mind.
Relationship/love. What type of relationships do you most desire to create? What does having a wonderful relationship with and being deeply valued by a lover, spouse, partner, children, friends, family members – or your community – feel like? Can you see yourself in your ideal situation? What might it look like? Try to be as detailed as you can as you create possibilities in your mind, allowing yourself to feel the wonderful emotions of these relationships and scenarios. This is vitally important, which I will touch on shortly.
Career/job. What would you be doing if you could do anything? Would you be a doctor, lawyer, corporate executive, spy, teacher, guru, or entrepreneur? What did you wish to be when you were a child? Can you feel into that state?
How did this meditation go? Did you get through all of these questions? Did you experience blocks or difficulty on any of them? Most of us have blocks In several of these areas. We are often trained from an early age by our parental figures to be limited or that we lack ability and value.
This is a false bill of goods and deeply unfortunate. We will never create an ideal world as long as we continue to teach our children that they are flawed and limited.😤
The good news is, these blocks show you the first part of your roadmap to a better reality. If you experienced a block when you asked yourself to be wealthy, or fearless, or have the relationship of your dreams, you know what programs need to be overlayed with new programs and patterns.
Which takes us back to visualization and feeling the way that we want to be. When we put our minds and bodies into a cohesive feeling state, we are not only creating greater health, but we are training ourselves to live in the future reality that we want to see rather than the past reality that has been holding us back.
We are also creating a magnetic and vibrational field that resonates to those around us and the quantum field, where Source can most readily bring us those components that we need to create the reality of our dreams.
If you experienced blocks in your ability to come into a feeling state from the exercise above, let’s go back and take each trait or emotion individually.
When you are ready, find your comfortable seated position. Begin with the first question you experienced difficulty with. Let’s say it was relationship – a hard one for most of us. Likely because of their own issues, our parents taught us that we were not valuable.
As a result, often without even realizing it, we behave in ways that perpetuate this belief in our adult relationships:
We don’t keep our word to those around us.
We let ourselves and others down or don’t always behave with honesty and integrity.
We speak to our loved ones in ways that are harmful.
We may find ourselves drawn to cheating on our partners – though we don’t want our primary relationship to end.
We shut down when it comes to communication.
And a host of other dysfunctional behaviors that keep us – and our loved ones -unhappy and perpetuating the belief that we lack value.
Ouch, right?🥵.
But here’s where we can transform those dysfunctional past subconscious programs into something so much greater and begin building the life and personality/personal reality that we wish to see rather than hating the person that we think we are.
Let’s say in our personal relationships we have a tendency to be short tempered and resentful, and our communication skills are lacking.
From your place of meditation, visualize a loving relationship with a partner in which you sit across from them, holding hands as you easily talk about those issues in your relationship that need work. Feel your heart center completely open, radiating light and warmth in this visualization.
(In a post a couple of weeks back, I spoke of heart coherence. This visualization will create coherence in your heart and mind not only in this moment, but in future moments as you experience this in reality.).
Feel the love and acceptance of your partner as you create a greater reality together. Hold yourself in this space for as long as you are able. The longer you are able to sustain coherence in meditation, the more you will experience it in everyday life.
Use this basic formula for each quality you wish to embody.
This may feel difficult at first. Remember that you are overlaying programs that have been there for many years and it will not feel comfortable the first time or even the first few times you practice, but you will notice that the more often you practice this meditation and visualization, the easier it will become.
From there, you will begin to see what may feel like miracles unfolding as these new neural networks draw into your reality exactly what you wish for.
This seemingly miraculous creation of new realities is a combination of new neural wiring and firing causing a release of A)different chemical messengers into the brain and body, B)accessing new possibilities in the quantum field, and C) our RAS (remember the Reticular Activating System; the brain’s “reality filter”? Someone mentions a red Fiat and suddenly we see five red Fiats on the freeway that we wouldn’t have noticed before) beginning to allow us to observe and draw to us new aspects of our everyday reality that we wouldn’t have seen with our old wiring and programs. Amazing stuff, right?🤩
Wherever you are, beloved, I hope you will read this and be inspired to become a conscious creator and reality shaper rather than a victim of past neurological programming. You deserve to be happy. You deserve to be fulfilled. You deserve to have your deepest desires and greatest wishes achieved. I believe in you, and I love you, always. 💖
We are all looking to feel greater empowerment in our lives. Greater authenticity. Greater individuality.
This is a beautiful thing.
But when individuality becomes separation, this can also disempower us.
When we create labels – or allow others to create labels for us – that create greater separation between us as a society; as a whole, we are also disempowered as a whole.
When birds in a flock fly united in a certain pattern, or a school of fish swims together, they do this in part to appear larger to or escape as a group from predators. This idea translates to humans, as well – as our forefathers understood well: United we stand, Divided we fall.
When we are divided and disempowered as a group, we are also more fear-based and dependent upon the large-scale “parent” institutions such as government, religion, and corporations.
Maybe it’s time that we recognize the damage we are doing to ourselves and our society with these labels and ways to create greater separation and less unity.
Maybe it’s time that we looked at the possibility that all of the labels we are putting so much emphasis on might just be instigated by the parent institutions that benefit the most from our lack of unity.
Maybe it’s time to see the labels that we once used to identify our individuality – “Black.” White”. “Brown.” “Yellow.” “Straight.” “Gay”. “Trans” “Asian-American” African-American” “Native American” have become tools to create greater division between groups of people.
Maybe it’s time to consider that the thousand and one other labels that are used to separate and create damage to our psyche such as “Karen.” “Ken.” “Snowflake” “Boomer”. “Young” “Old” “Vaccinated.” “Unvaccinated” – might just be being used against us rather than for us.
Maybe it’s time to stop looking at those things that separate us and start focusing on those things that unite us. We are one people. One Planet.
I’m not saying we shouldn’t celebrate our uniqueness. Not even slightly.
I geek out hard on things that many wouldn’t such as brain/body biology, quantum physics, spirituality. I also love travel, writing, reading, dancing, cooking, eating, animals, family/framily, coffee, style and a hundred other things that make Me uniquely Me – and I honor and celebrate those traits and qualities that you geek out about and make You uniquely You.
You are magnificent!😍
It’s amazing and beautiful that we each are this incredible amalgamation of genes and environmental factors. Truly.
But when we focus on division between us of those larger aspects such as race, sexual orientation, political division, religious affiliation, age, health preferences or whatever seems to be the current trend dictated by the media and social media – we no longer have ownership of our individual identity and uniqueness.
Rather, we lose sight of honoring and celebrating our own and others individuality in favor of the corporate mentality of a select few.
Here’s a visual to better explain what I’m trying to portray:
Imagine being at a huge music festival. There is a stellar lineup of bands and musicians. The music is just phenomenal. (Kind of like our planet and Source.)
At first, everyone is having an amazing time. It’s a pinnacle experience.
But soon after the festival begins, instead of the thousands of quirky, fun, funny, music-living folks attending being united in enjoying the incredible vibe of the festival, people divide into small groups of forty or fifty people.
Let’s say there are the Boho style groups, the “hippie” groups, the Dave Matthews Band groups, the classical music groups, the rock and rollers, the cowboy boot groups, the beanie hat groups and the floppy hat groups – all huddled up, feeling self-righteous about their group – but also fearful, insecure and angry because everyone else isn’t in their group.
Pretty soon, this insecurity causes a few in each group to start shouting about their way being best because such and such government entities, religious organizations, style experts or health groups said it was the right way. Before you know it, all the groups are screaming at each other, the music and the vibe completely forgotten. 😣
How long do you think it would be before the shouting turns to violence? How long before the musicians stop playing and walk offstage?
How many of us have forgotten the music and the vibe that created us and this amazing planet – as a result of buying into the labels and separation?
But we can bring the music back when we stop using those labels to separate us and begin to celebrate our uniqueness while also honoring those things that unite us. One tribe, one vibe.
In this final part of this series, I’m going to give you the formula – and the practices that will take you from Woe to Wow. From dis-ease to ease.
To begin, let’s go back to our core belief systems for a moment to discuss how it relates to Personality = Personal Reality. Our Personality is created largely through our Personal Belief System, and our Personal Belief System creates our reality.
Here’s the basic formula for how we create our reality each day:
CBS + T + E/F +B + H = E/R
Core Belief System (CBS) = Thoughts = Emotions/Feelings/Frequencies =
Behaviors = Habits = Experience (Results)
Let’s break that down:
Our Core Belief System, those neurological patterns and programs that began to be established in early childhood, tend to keep us running in a subconscious loop that are based upon our past experience.
If as children we lived in a home where lack was the norm, it will be difficult to move past the idea that we live in a reality of lack.
Our Beliefs will perpetuate the thoughts and emotions of lack. (How many times do parents say “we can’t afford this. We are broke” Or “we will buy you the cheaper version of what you really want.” These words create our reality and personal sense of value as children.)
Those thoughts and emotions of lack will create behaviors that reflect our beliefs. The emotions/feelings of our Core Beliefs cause our brain and body to create neurochemicals. These can either create physical dis-ease and dysfunction, lowered immune system and a host of other symptoms or greater health, or increased immune function and energy and well-being, depending on whether our thoughts and emotions are positive or negative.
They also create our behaviors and habits – I have a little extra cash in our pocket. Because I believe I live in a state of lack, I spend it on some trinket – rather than saving and eventually investing in a healthy future. The results of these habits of course just reinforce our initial belief – I spent all of my money and I am in lack again. I will always be in lack. And so we are…
Or another example – My parents taught me that I am clumsy. As an adult, I am constantly falling on stairs, dropping dishes, etc. because I believe I am clumsy. Falling on the stairs or dropping dishes confirms that Core Belief, putting us into vibrational alignment, which creates more similar experiences.
If we grew up in an environment where our personal reality was abundance, our pre-set programming for continuing to thrive in an environment of abundance is greater. We will never feel a sense of lack and our behaviors and habits will reflect that.
Of course, there are different types of lack and abundance beyond the material. If our family was wealthy but lacked emotional intelligence or love, we will still be more likely to live a life of lack as adults. Conversely, if we had parents that were financially lacking but loving and supportive emotionally, our capacity for thriving in an environment of abundance as adults is much greater.
It is important to note that if we experienced childhood or adolescent trauma, our ability to create a life that reflects high personal value will be less, as well.
This being said, we have to look at a new formula for creating the life we wish to see:
Access/Acknowledge CBS + Reprogram thoughts/Shift emotions + Alignment (Establish behaviors & habits to reflect new reality)+ Behaviors/Habits = Results/Reality
In order to create a new reality for ourselves, we have to access and acknowledge the source of our limiting beliefs. What lines have you drawn in the sand without realizing it – where are those boundaries of belief and what is the origin/source? What are the thoughts and feelings that accompany these beliefs?
Once we have accessed those beliefs and memories that are perpetuating our subconscious programming, we can begin to reprogram the mind.
Ask yourself how you would like to expand the boundaries you had previously created for yourself, likely without even realizing you had drawn those lines in the sand? Visualize wiping those lines away.
Write it down! What do you want to see in your future reality? Vision boards are a great way to create greater clarity in visualization.
A vital aspect of beginning to move into that future reality is the emotional vibration of it. Can you imagine yourself there? How does it feel?
For example – If you have a dream of living in the Caribbean, see yourself on the beach.
Feel the warmth of the sand between your toes, cool trade breezes dancing off your skin. See the crystal-clear turquoise of the water before you. Imagine your beautiful plantation-style home behind you, surrounded by tall palms and lush greenery.
I love the feeling of being on a motorcycle. While I don’t currently own one, I often go back to the feeling visualization of racing through long country roads, green trees rushing past. Or the wind buffeting my face as I cruise along the California coastline, tall madronas on towering cliffs above the wild Pacific ocean.
What future reality would you like to see for yourself? It works, believe me. I’ve easily manifested sports cars, homes, amazing vacations around the world, vintage campers… and as just a few examples. Remove your limits and start visualizing!
Clear your mind. Get quiet. Imagine the version of you/reality you wish to see at a distance of say, half a mile away. Now begin to move in a straight line towards that point. Feel into that space. Feel the joy there. Feel the possibility there. Feel the excitement in that space.
Try to remain in this mindstate for as long as possible. The longer and more often we can sustain this higher frequency state, the faster we will notice the fulfillment and manifestation of that reality. But if you can’t quite get there all the time, give yourself love and grace. Go back to that one happy thought that can get you closer to that future self.
Next we need to create habits and behaviors that reflect the personality – personal reality – we want to see.
A habit of presence and gratitude is an essential component in creating a better reality. Remember that heart coherence creates a healthier body and mind and a vibrational resonance that we send out into the world around us and the quantum realm/Source frequency.
Desire/Ask/Believe/Receive – But what is the vibration in which you are asking? Tuning in to where our mind is frequently and keeping a daily gratitude journal will help keep our energetic frequencies and neurochemicals vital, healthy and happy.
Create a daily habit of movement and nourishment. How you move is up to you, but daily exercise keeps both mind and body healthier and in a higher vibrational state.
Find those other habits and behaviors that reflect the reality you are creating.
Do you want to become an artist? Paint! Take classes. Experiment with different forms of media and components.
A writer? Write every damned day, even if it’s only for a few minutes.
Do you want to open a small (or big) business? Look into an LLC and a business plan.
Whatever your dream, try to come back to the state of being that future self (personality) holds as much as possible. Remember that we are looking for alignment with that ideal reality/personal reality. A good mantra is simply the question: Am I aligned?
From this place of alignment and coherence, watch the miracles begin to unfold. I can’t wait to see what the future holds for you, beautiful one. You deserve every good thing your imagination can hold, and more!
We talked yesterday about the importance of finding a sense of gratitude in the present moment – in order to become more aligned with the future we wish to see. The more often we can hold ourselves in this state of gratitude and presence, the closer we become to accessing the quantum field of possibility and achieving resonance with Source – putting power behind our prayers.
Another of the beautiful aspects of coming into alignment with our highest selves is that we obtain a sense of peace and gratitude in the moment that causes heart coherence – our heart beats with a steady rhythm. There is no irregularity or arrhythmia; only too common occurrences these days.
As I mentioned in an earlier post, heart coherence reduces cortisol and adrenaline and increases output of Immunoglobulin A which increases immune function by up to 50% (!) and creates greater access to available energy.
Studies have been done on measurable photons in the energy field surrounding the body while in a state of heart coherence. The increase in these light waves – accessible energy – is typically more than doubled.
Wow, right?
But here’s what’s extra cool about achieving heart coherence: When we achieve this state, our bodies produce a chemical hormone called Oxytocin. Oxytocin is the “love hormone” that puts us in a state of bliss and connection. This release of Oxytocin causes the heart to release a chemical called Endofillial Derived Relaxing Factor.(EDRF)
EDRF causes the vessels of the heart to expand, not only creating greater oxygenation and blood flow, but also acting as an amplifier for all of those positive hormones and neurochemicals.
The amplification of these hormones not only causes intense feelings of bliss but can also reset the amygdala, the part of the brain responsible for processing fear and holding past trauma. This means achieving heart resonance can literally rewire the brain. Now that is just pretty frickin’ AMAZING.
Stay with me, because here’s where we begin to learn the practice behind all that we have been learning about so far.
It’s important to recognize that we can’t always immediately get into this blissful state when we have been stuck in negative thought patterns – but we can get closer to it.
And just practicing being closer today means eventually, Bingo! You will find yourself heart-centered, healthier, and amazed by the feeling of joy that your brain and body produce.
When we are in this space, we begin to arrange our values, thoughts, habits, and energetic vibration (vibrational frequency) to reflect the person and reality that we want to be and see.
We become a vibrational match for that wonderful reality that we have dreamed of.
So how do we begin to get closer to alignment and coherence when we feel stuck?
We start by leaning into the feeling of any thought that is better than where we currently are.
Here’s an example – If you, like me, are someone that has suffered from Insomnia, you know that when you wake in the middle of the night, the mind tends to start racing.
Often the thought patterns that keep us awake for hours on end aren’t necessarily happy ones. Many years ago, I would find myself awake most nights from midnight to 4 or 5 am. This went on for months.
At first, I called it “doing the work” as I processed through trauma of the past for hours on end, but eventually I realized that I was no longer processing through but was instead stuck in that past pain.
So, on the advice of Wayne Dyer, Dr. Joe Dispenza, Dr. Bruce Lipton and other experts and self-development gurus, I began to shift my thoughts to one thing that felt better in my life.
Walking the beach with my beautiful children and happy dogs.
Chatting with my dad over coffee on religion, mechanics, and co-creation.
The brief but meaningful exchange I had with a beautiful stranger at the grocery store or the park that morning.
Time spent with friends.
Teaching classes.
A beautiful bouquet of peonies or Stargazer lilies
Or whatever else I may have recently experienced that made me feel good.
Before I knew it, a sense of peace and gratitude lulled my mind back into relaxation and I was fast asleep.
What is vitally important here is that we don’t just think about those things that make us feel a little better but we feel or lean into the positive emotion of those memories. This changes our neuralchemical output and begins to re-structure the brain.
We don’t have to suffer from insomnia to practice this.
The best time to start this feel-good meditation is in the morning, before any obstacles of the day can influence how easily we are able to access the feeling of gratitude, (I highly recommend beginning a gratitude journal each morning) but we can reach for that next good feeling any time of the day or night, bringing us closer to that place of alignment with our future selves and blissful heart coherence.
Practice:
Find someplace quiet to sit or lie down in a comfortable position. Close your eyes and take your focus to your breath, breathing deeply into your abdomen from your nose.
Allow your mind to quiet, bringing the focus back to the breath each time your mind becomes busy.
Observe thoughts without engaging, like watching clouds float across the sky.
Think of one positive thing from the day, or the day before if you are practicing in the morning – or even something you are excited about that is upcoming. Feel into the gratitude of that thought and space.
Try to notice if that feeling is in your heart center. If not, see if you can bring it closer to the center of the chest, just behind the sternum. Try to stay in that place of feeling good for at least five minutes, or longer if possible.
Each time you feel yourself beginning to cycle downward during the day in your thoughts or emotions, try to come back to that place. Practice makes perfect.😎
Tomorrow – Part 5 in the Anxiety to Alignment series:
Big breath on today’s post, babe. I’m going to get deep on one of the key barriers to self-acceptance, authenticity, freedom and happiness. I’m talking about those things that hold us and keep us trapped in stagnation, unable to move forward – our attachments.
This might hurt a little as we rip off some band-aids, but it will be so worth the healing if you read to the end. Of course, implementation is a necessary step in growth, but you’ve got this and I’m right here with you every step of the way.
We form connections and attachments to our homes, schools, pets, professions and jobs, sports teams, sense of style and a hundred other things that we identify with on the daily.
But that is where it can get tricky.
We need connections, but our self-worth can get so very wrapped up in those things that we identify with.
We become attached first to a thing or person, but at some point, that thing or person becomes part of who we believe ourselves to be. It is only too easy from there to lose sight of ourselves as we wrap our sense of identity up in a person, place or thing.
Connection is spirit-based. Identification is ego-based. Here’s an example many can relate to: I really love my morning cuppa joe. I would even go so far as to say I have an attachment to it. The ritual of preparation, the aroma of the freshly ground beans, the rich, cinnamon-laced chocolatey goodness as it pours into my special mug each morning is one of the things that starts my day out right. I do drink organic coffee because unfortunately, coffee is one of the least regulated food products on the planet and tends to be contaminated with mold, pesticides and a variety of other yuck that we really should never put into our bodies. Just sayin’.
But enjoying my early morning deliciousness because it makes me feel amazing vs. considering myself a “coffee snob” who only drinks XYZ coffee at XYZ time of the day with XYZ people, who of course are the best kind of people moves me from healthy connection and mentality to ego-based identification.
I use coffee because it’s an easy example for me, but we can insert whatever attachment rings true to you – sports teams (are you obsessed with the Seahawks/Redskins/Greenbay/etc., or do you watch for the enjoyment of the sport?) to relationships (I couldn’t possibly live a happy, healthy life without my Spouse/Partner/BFF/Hookup/etc.)
Are you still with me? Here’s where we get to the real meat of the subject.
If we come to a place where that something or someone becomes so intrinsically attached to our value that we lose who we truly are, what happens when we no longer have that thing or person? What happens when the relationship or attachment becomes toxic or no longer truly serves who we are or who we wish to be?
When this happens, it is time to step back in order to come to an awareness of how those attachments might be holding us back from freedom, from being who we are – and who we were meant to be.
Here’s where we rip off the band-aid and let go of those things that are familiar to us when they no longer serve or have become toxic. Let’s be frank – it is so hard. We humans like routine. We like the familiar.
Or maybe better to say that we are most comfortable with the familiar.
Stepping out of a long-held comfort zone feels – uncomfortable. Hard. If you are in a place where you are being forced to let go of something – or someone – deeply familiar and are overwhelmed by negative emotion, don’t beat yourself up for struggling to “let that shit go” because babe, you are not alone and there is a reason it’s hard.
The pain of this emotional withdrawal is a combination of our biology and our ego. Our ego likes to create identity. It makes us feel like we belong somewhere, that whatever we are makes us valuable – “My name is Terah. I’m an empath. I’m also a mother, writer, artist, martial arts and yoga teacher and intuitive healer.” And there you have it, right? All that I am summed up in one sentence and wrapped up in a tidy little package. We do the same thing to nearly everything in our lives – including God, whatever God might be.
But fuck, babe. I am so damned much more than those titles and labels. So is God. And so are you. You are an amazing, limitless spirit that just so happens to be wrapped up in a meat suit – but even that label is inaccurate because that meat is frickin’ energy, dancing, whirling and spiraling – and just waiting for us to direct our intentional creation to it. Cool, right?
As long as our physical form doesn’t become just another aspect of our ego identification, that is. Body identification can be one of the greatest inhibitors to emotional freedom there is, especially in our current society. The trick is to want to feel your best because you love yourself, and want your external self to be a reflection of the amazing creation you are inside. Versus having a need to look your best because it’s what society expects or where your self-worth comes from.
But I digress, a little. The second reason it is so difficult to let go of our attachments is biology. The longer we hold something as a part of who we are, the more those attachments become neurological patterns – starting as connections in the brain, moving to pathways and eventually, if we stay in those identities too long, those neural pathways become trenches that require Herculean effort to alter. It’s not impossible but it is damned hard and requires nearly-constant awareness and re-programming work for a while to overcome.
Let me give you another example – A while back, I met with my friend Michelle who is currently going through a separation from her husband. The relationship was founded in some mutually unhealthy patterns but she was eventually able to see that those patterns weren’t serving who she was becoming and she didn’t want to remain in that stuck place any more. They tried to work things out but just had too many of their patterns wrapped up in cycles of victimhood and dysfunction.
Suddenly on her own, Michelle found herself grieving far more than she felt she should have been, especially as she had known where the relationship was headed for several years. Some days she felt so heavy that she could hardly function – but she noticed it was worse when she would be in the places they had been together. As we spoke, I pointed out that it made perfect sense – her sense of identity and value had been wrapped up in who she was in the relationship for a long time.
She was a wife. A partner. A playmate. A best friend, chef, housekeeper and a million other titles that seemed exclusive to that relationship. How many of us can relate? So Michelle wasn’t just grieving the end of the marriage but also who she had been in that marriage.
Divorce isn’t just the end of a relationship. It is too often the death of an identity. After 15 years her neurological pathways relating to her relationship were trenches that she had to dig herself out of – an emotionally and physically painful process.
But here’s what was awesome – having the “aha” moment of why she was having such a hard time – that she had her identity wrapped up in who she was as a wife rather than an individual and spiritual being – helped her to climb out of the depression she was experiencing. She will still have work to do and daily affirmations to reprogram those patterns but she’s on her way to freedom, joy, and self-creation.
Can you relate to your identity being wrapped up in something so deeply that to be without it feels devastating? If so, loved one, now is the time to give yourself lots of grace. Lots of love. And get to work!
– Write down daily affirmations on your own worth – just as you are.
– Take time to meditate.
– Give yourself plenty of self-care.
– Visualize the future you wish to see – and the you
that you want to be, ideally before bed or upon waking when your brain is in an alpha or theta state – the best time to reprogram old patterns.
Happy healing, beloved. I can’t wait to see how joyous freedom feels on you!
Life is a beautiful gift, isn’t it? While on a walk recently I stopped to appreciate the perfection of these thistles and the way the sunlight hit them jussst right. Wow.🤩
We all have these moments of appreciation, but did you know that gratitude is a learned behavior?
We tend to think of it as something that comes naturally, but in actuality it is something we have to practice, and the more we practice the more naturally it happens.
The opposite is true, too. It can be only too easy to dwell in a negative state and entirely forget how blessed we are.
We might even say that we have to unlearn a lack of gratitude as well as developing a practice of appreciation to achieve lasting joy.
We live in a world where we tend to focus on the negative rather than the positive, and so forget to be aware of the abundant reality that most of us live in. Politics, the media, and the issues pertaining to this global pandemic – along with a host of other subjects – can cause anyone to head into a tailspin of negative emotion.
I’ve written before that I have a daily gratitude practice that improves my level of happiness dramatically, but I still found myself in this downward cycle last night.
After a very enjoyable evening with friends I stopped to pick up some groceries. As often happens, I ended up spending wayyy more time than I had intended in the store and as a result was home putting away groceries at nearly 10pm, tired and more than a little grumpy as a result.
“This sucks. Why am I frickin’ putting away groceries at 10 pm when I should be getting ready for bed?” I still have to do those dishes from earlier. The dog is whining. (Because I was being stupid noisy in the kitchen and she was trying to sleep…😒) Well f#ck, I just broke the coffee pot.”… (because I wasn’t being aware)
And before you know it, I’m thinking about all the other negative events from the day, the fact that my back is a little tender right now as a result of days of moving furniture and projects around the house and a host of other negatives just because. 😑
But this morning, as I prepared a gf bagel with the lox, herbed goat cheese, capers and avocado I had picked up while shopping last night for breakfast, I reminded myself that my negative state of the night before was a CHOICE that I made.
I could have been feeling excited and grateful for the gorgeous lox I found on sale, the herbed goat cheese spread that I hadn’t seen before, along with a variety of other items many would consider “luxury foods” but I am blessed to enjoy daily.
I could have been grateful for the fact that I have money in the bank to buy those groceries in the first place.
I could have been thinking about the lovely time I had with friends earlier, the myriad projects I have completed recently, the sun and blue skies that broke from days of clouds and rain here in the Pacific NW – or a thousand other wonderful things that I experience on the daily.
But instead I chose to slide from being unhappy about putting away groceries at 10pm to an all-out pity party negative state.
How many out there can relate? How often do we start our day in a wonderful mood but after reading the news or discussing politics at the water cooler find ourselves wishing for a nightcap – at lunchtime – to dampen the killer tension headache we have suddenly developed? Or we have an evening run-in with an obnoxious driver and find ourselves in a state of rage hours later, unable to sleep well as a result of the cortisol and adrenaline still in our system?
(The mind talks to the body every second, sending chemical messengers into the bloodstream in response to our thoughts and emotions. The way you feel physically is often a reflection of our subconscious thought patterns.)
Well, I don’t know about you, but I sure do like feeling happy, excited and ready to take on the world a whole lot more than being grumpy, anxious and fearful, wanting to crawl into my safe little hole instead of finding fun adventure and good friends.
And I 💯 know that the best way – maybe the only way – to get back to my best self is to change my mind state and vibrational frequencies.
I used to tell my kids to “flip their happy switch” when they were in a negative mood. Taking my own advice, this morning I made the choice to flip my happy switch. I had a fabulous walk with my pups, enjoyed my perfect cup of French press coffee (since I broke my other pot, LOL) and especially savored the preparation and consumption of that breakfast.
As I sit writing this, I am gratefully aware of the gentle breeze stirring the curtains, the soothing, happy blues, purples and yellows of my home, the green plants on my window and my big comfy couch. And my big cup of coffee, obvs.😉
It’s a good day to feel grateful.
It’s a good day to be happy.
It’s a good day to have a really, really good day. Don’t you agree?🥰
What are some things that you are especially thankful for right now? How do you best “Flip your Happy Switch”?
(This just might be the name of my next book, btw… another thing to be grateful for!🤩😁😁)
We may not realize it, but every moment we are choosing who we are. Hero, Villain or Victim. Eggplant or shining star.
But when we act like a 🍆, it is only too easy to make excuses for our bad behavior, isn’t it?
“I’m in a bad mood because…
– I’m tired.
– I have a headache/stomachache/body ache/allergies, etc…
– My boss/employee/friend/acquaintance/partner/kid doesn’t value me.
– I didn’t get the job/promotion/position I wanted…
I didn’t get my way…
There is always a litany of reasons/excuses why it’s ok for us to be difficult, moody or angry.
These “reasons” allow us to lash out at those closest to us. To be a d#ck to our friends, co-workers or the cashier at the supermarket. To allow a dark cloud to follow us around and confirm all the reasons why we are a victim.
Right about now you might be thinking that I’m kind of a 🍆 for being so harsh, right? 😬
But here’s the thing, babe. The truth often hurts – and it’s not until we take an honest look at our behaviors that we can actually become the person that we want to be rather than the person our past experiences and behaviors dictate we be.
Unfortunately for many of us, our past involved parental figures and peers that made us feel less than capable. Less than valuable. Less than worthy. And so we play out the emotional repercussions these past patterns cause each day by allowing our subconscious to rule our emotions and actions rather than our awareness. But when it comes down to it, most of us would probably choose happiness, light, ease, kindness, and compassion as our key traits rather than being known as an Eyore or an asshole, right?
You choose your behaviors, consciously or unconsciously. The difference between training good behavior in yourself – or not – is whether or not you choose to be conscious or allow your unconscious patterns to dick-tate who you are.
So ask yourself this question: Who do I want to be – a hero, victim, or a villain?
This is your story and you are writing the plot, characters and outcome, my love. You are the hero – or villain (victim) of your own story.
So what are you choosing today?
Are you allowing all of life’s contrasts to shape you into forged steel – or melt you into slag?
Are you allowing that headache/fatigue/negative experience to excuse bad behavior – or are you becoming the hero and shining your amazing light, in spite of your circumstance?
This Blessed Sacred Life 