“Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors for you where before there were only walls.” – Joseph Campbell
Community and friendship is so very important for healthy mindset and brain biology.
Spending time with good friends, seeking out fun adventures and enjoying good food (and coffee😎) are just a few ways we can follow our bliss.
Combining all of the above is a great way to watch the walls of our own bullsh#t crumble to be replaced by joy, creation and some epic frickin’ manifestation.
Babe, you might not be quite to the place of believing in your own magic and amazing ability to create a life you are madly in love with, but believe me when I tell you – you ARE a mutherfudding WiZARD – and if you follow those things that bring you bliss, you will see reality unfold around you in ways that can only be described as magical. ✨💫
I see it Every.Single.Day, and no, I’m not exaggerating this.
When I hold myself in a place of high vibrational resonance, miracles happen and all that I ask just flows to me. It is 💯 amazing and still blows my mind on the regular.
This is what I want for you, beautiful one. I want you to feel joy in every fiber of your being – from you head to your toes and every cell in between, and then I want to see you amazed by the way reality bends around you to suit your every need and desire. 🥰
Find your bliss, babe. And if you needed to read this today, I see you, and I’m sending you so much love. 💖
In this final part of this series, I’m going to give you the formula – and the practices that will take you from Woe to Wow. From dis-ease to ease.
To begin, let’s go back to our core belief systems for a moment to discuss how it relates to Personality = Personal Reality. Our Personality is created largely through our Personal Belief System, and our Personal Belief System creates our reality.
Here’s the basic formula for how we create our reality each day:
CBS + T + E/F +B + H = E/R
Core Belief System (CBS) = Thoughts = Emotions/Feelings/Frequencies =
Behaviors = Habits = Experience (Results)
Let’s break that down:
Our Core Belief System, those neurological patterns and programs that began to be established in early childhood, tend to keep us running in a subconscious loop that are based upon our past experience.
If as children we lived in a home where lack was the norm, it will be difficult to move past the idea that we live in a reality of lack.
Our Beliefs will perpetuate the thoughts and emotions of lack. (How many times do parents say “we can’t afford this. We are broke” Or “we will buy you the cheaper version of what you really want.” These words create our reality and personal sense of value as children.)
Those thoughts and emotions of lack will create behaviors that reflect our beliefs. The emotions/feelings of our Core Beliefs cause our brain and body to create neurochemicals. These can either create physical dis-ease and dysfunction, lowered immune system and a host of other symptoms or greater health, or increased immune function and energy and well-being, depending on whether our thoughts and emotions are positive or negative.
They also create our behaviors and habits – I have a little extra cash in our pocket. Because I believe I live in a state of lack, I spend it on some trinket – rather than saving and eventually investing in a healthy future. The results of these habits of course just reinforce our initial belief – I spent all of my money and I am in lack again. I will always be in lack. And so we are…
Or another example – My parents taught me that I am clumsy. As an adult, I am constantly falling on stairs, dropping dishes, etc. because I believe I am clumsy. Falling on the stairs or dropping dishes confirms that Core Belief, putting us into vibrational alignment, which creates more similar experiences.
If we grew up in an environment where our personal reality was abundance, our pre-set programming for continuing to thrive in an environment of abundance is greater. We will never feel a sense of lack and our behaviors and habits will reflect that.
Of course, there are different types of lack and abundance beyond the material. If our family was wealthy but lacked emotional intelligence or love, we will still be more likely to live a life of lack as adults. Conversely, if we had parents that were financially lacking but loving and supportive emotionally, our capacity for thriving in an environment of abundance as adults is much greater.
It is important to note that if we experienced childhood or adolescent trauma, our ability to create a life that reflects high personal value will be less, as well.
This being said, we have to look at a new formula for creating the life we wish to see:
Access/Acknowledge CBS + Reprogram thoughts/Shift emotions + Alignment (Establish behaviors & habits to reflect new reality)+ Behaviors/Habits = Results/Reality
In order to create a new reality for ourselves, we have to access and acknowledge the source of our limiting beliefs. What lines have you drawn in the sand without realizing it – where are those boundaries of belief and what is the origin/source? What are the thoughts and feelings that accompany these beliefs?
Once we have accessed those beliefs and memories that are perpetuating our subconscious programming, we can begin to reprogram the mind.
Ask yourself how you would like to expand the boundaries you had previously created for yourself, likely without even realizing you had drawn those lines in the sand? Visualize wiping those lines away.
Write it down! What do you want to see in your future reality? Vision boards are a great way to create greater clarity in visualization.
A vital aspect of beginning to move into that future reality is the emotional vibration of it. Can you imagine yourself there? How does it feel?
For example – If you have a dream of living in the Caribbean, see yourself on the beach.
Feel the warmth of the sand between your toes, cool trade breezes dancing off your skin. See the crystal-clear turquoise of the water before you. Imagine your beautiful plantation-style home behind you, surrounded by tall palms and lush greenery.
I love the feeling of being on a motorcycle. While I don’t currently own one, I often go back to the feeling visualization of racing through long country roads, green trees rushing past. Or the wind buffeting my face as I cruise along the California coastline, tall madronas on towering cliffs above the wild Pacific ocean.
What future reality would you like to see for yourself? It works, believe me. I’ve easily manifested sports cars, homes, amazing vacations around the world, vintage campers… and as just a few examples. Remove your limits and start visualizing!
Clear your mind. Get quiet. Imagine the version of you/reality you wish to see at a distance of say, half a mile away. Now begin to move in a straight line towards that point. Feel into that space. Feel the joy there. Feel the possibility there. Feel the excitement in that space.
Try to remain in this mindstate for as long as possible. The longer and more often we can sustain this higher frequency state, the faster we will notice the fulfillment and manifestation of that reality. But if you can’t quite get there all the time, give yourself love and grace. Go back to that one happy thought that can get you closer to that future self.
Next we need to create habits and behaviors that reflect the personality – personal reality – we want to see.
A habit of presence and gratitude is an essential component in creating a better reality. Remember that heart coherence creates a healthier body and mind and a vibrational resonance that we send out into the world around us and the quantum realm/Source frequency.
Desire/Ask/Believe/Receive – But what is the vibration in which you are asking? Tuning in to where our mind is frequently and keeping a daily gratitude journal will help keep our energetic frequencies and neurochemicals vital, healthy and happy.
Create a daily habit of movement and nourishment. How you move is up to you, but daily exercise keeps both mind and body healthier and in a higher vibrational state.
Find those other habits and behaviors that reflect the reality you are creating.
Do you want to become an artist? Paint! Take classes. Experiment with different forms of media and components.
A writer? Write every damned day, even if it’s only for a few minutes.
Do you want to open a small (or big) business? Look into an LLC and a business plan.
Whatever your dream, try to come back to the state of being that future self (personality) holds as much as possible. Remember that we are looking for alignment with that ideal reality/personal reality. A good mantra is simply the question: Am I aligned?
From this place of alignment and coherence, watch the miracles begin to unfold. I can’t wait to see what the future holds for you, beautiful one. You deserve every good thing your imagination can hold, and more!
We talked yesterday about the importance of finding a sense of gratitude in the present moment – in order to become more aligned with the future we wish to see. The more often we can hold ourselves in this state of gratitude and presence, the closer we become to accessing the quantum field of possibility and achieving resonance with Source – putting power behind our prayers.
Another of the beautiful aspects of coming into alignment with our highest selves is that we obtain a sense of peace and gratitude in the moment that causes heart coherence – our heart beats with a steady rhythm. There is no irregularity or arrhythmia; only too common occurrences these days.
As I mentioned in an earlier post, heart coherence reduces cortisol and adrenaline and increases output of Immunoglobulin A which increases immune function by up to 50% (!) and creates greater access to available energy.
Studies have been done on measurable photons in the energy field surrounding the body while in a state of heart coherence. The increase in these light waves – accessible energy – is typically more than doubled.
Wow, right?
But here’s what’s extra cool about achieving heart coherence: When we achieve this state, our bodies produce a chemical hormone called Oxytocin. Oxytocin is the “love hormone” that puts us in a state of bliss and connection. This release of Oxytocin causes the heart to release a chemical called Endofillial Derived Relaxing Factor.(EDRF)
EDRF causes the vessels of the heart to expand, not only creating greater oxygenation and blood flow, but also acting as an amplifier for all of those positive hormones and neurochemicals.
The amplification of these hormones not only causes intense feelings of bliss but can also reset the amygdala, the part of the brain responsible for processing fear and holding past trauma. This means achieving heart resonance can literally rewire the brain. Now that is just pretty frickin’ AMAZING.
Stay with me, because here’s where we begin to learn the practice behind all that we have been learning about so far.
It’s important to recognize that we can’t always immediately get into this blissful state when we have been stuck in negative thought patterns – but we can get closer to it.
And just practicing being closer today means eventually, Bingo! You will find yourself heart-centered, healthier, and amazed by the feeling of joy that your brain and body produce.
When we are in this space, we begin to arrange our values, thoughts, habits, and energetic vibration (vibrational frequency) to reflect the person and reality that we want to be and see.
We become a vibrational match for that wonderful reality that we have dreamed of.
So how do we begin to get closer to alignment and coherence when we feel stuck?
We start by leaning into the feeling of any thought that is better than where we currently are.
Here’s an example – If you, like me, are someone that has suffered from Insomnia, you know that when you wake in the middle of the night, the mind tends to start racing.
Often the thought patterns that keep us awake for hours on end aren’t necessarily happy ones. Many years ago, I would find myself awake most nights from midnight to 4 or 5 am. This went on for months.
At first, I called it “doing the work” as I processed through trauma of the past for hours on end, but eventually I realized that I was no longer processing through but was instead stuck in that past pain.
So, on the advice of Wayne Dyer, Dr. Joe Dispenza, Dr. Bruce Lipton and other experts and self-development gurus, I began to shift my thoughts to one thing that felt better in my life.
Walking the beach with my beautiful children and happy dogs.
Chatting with my dad over coffee on religion, mechanics, and co-creation.
The brief but meaningful exchange I had with a beautiful stranger at the grocery store or the park that morning.
Time spent with friends.
Teaching classes.
A beautiful bouquet of peonies or Stargazer lilies
Or whatever else I may have recently experienced that made me feel good.
Before I knew it, a sense of peace and gratitude lulled my mind back into relaxation and I was fast asleep.
What is vitally important here is that we don’t just think about those things that make us feel a little better but we feel or lean into the positive emotion of those memories. This changes our neuralchemical output and begins to re-structure the brain.
We don’t have to suffer from insomnia to practice this.
The best time to start this feel-good meditation is in the morning, before any obstacles of the day can influence how easily we are able to access the feeling of gratitude, (I highly recommend beginning a gratitude journal each morning) but we can reach for that next good feeling any time of the day or night, bringing us closer to that place of alignment with our future selves and blissful heart coherence.
Practice:
Find someplace quiet to sit or lie down in a comfortable position. Close your eyes and take your focus to your breath, breathing deeply into your abdomen from your nose.
Allow your mind to quiet, bringing the focus back to the breath each time your mind becomes busy.
Observe thoughts without engaging, like watching clouds float across the sky.
Think of one positive thing from the day, or the day before if you are practicing in the morning – or even something you are excited about that is upcoming. Feel into the gratitude of that thought and space.
Try to notice if that feeling is in your heart center. If not, see if you can bring it closer to the center of the chest, just behind the sternum. Try to stay in that place of feeling good for at least five minutes, or longer if possible.
Each time you feel yourself beginning to cycle downward during the day in your thoughts or emotions, try to come back to that place. Practice makes perfect.😎
Tomorrow – Part 5 in the Anxiety to Alignment series:
The next few days I am going to take you through a series designed to give you the formula for changing your life for the better, from woe to WOW!, from being a victim of your environment to becoming a deliberate creator. This formula is science-based and may be the most powerful thing I’ve ever written.
So don’t scroll past.
You can not create a positive life with a negative mind.
Let me put this another way:
You can not create the life of your dreams if you are living in survival mode.
If you are experiencing anxiety, fear, frustration, anger or depression on a regular basis, you are in survival mode.
In this lower frequency (14-40 Hz) Beta brain wave state, your brain is producing cortisol and adrenaline on the regular. Your heart-brain coherence will be deregulated and your energetic resonance lower, which means you have less access to your energy reserves for brain and body use. You also produce less energy in your magnetic field, what some call the aura.
This is measurable and documented in thousands of studies.
It’s not just a matter of damaging neuropeptides and chemicals, either.
Your thoughts produce an electrical charge. Your feelings produce a magnetic charge.
The combination of these two charges create a resonance that you broadcast into the world at large – measurable in brain and heart monitors and “picked up” by those around us – as well as into the quantum field; that place where we best communicate with Source/God.
So when we are in chronic stress, we are broadcasting messages of fear. Of lack. Of pain – instead of messages of love, faith, joy, and creation.
And then we wonder why we stay in those same patterns and create the same circumstances over and over and over again; or we wonder why our prayers for a better life aren’t being heard.
Our prayers are being answered. We just don’t realize that our resonance isn’t asking the same thing that our mouth is.
What’s interesting about this is that the Bible specifically says to “pray with thanksgiving”. Gratitude is mentioned 71 times in the New Testament alone. The Qur’an mentions gratitude numerous times and is considered a fundamental teaching of Islam. Buddhist teachings are to cultivate gratitude as an attitude or habit.
If we want better for ourselves, we need to be in a higher resonance or vibrational state before we start asking, and we need to stay in that state as we ask. Gratitude is the perfect place to access that higher resonance.
If we can do this, miracles can begin to take place.
Stay tuned tomorrow for a breakdown of how we alter our current trajectory to move from woe is me to WOW is me?
Life is a beautiful gift, isn’t it? While on a walk recently I stopped to appreciate the perfection of these thistles and the way the sunlight hit them jussst right. Wow.🤩
We all have these moments of appreciation, but did you know that gratitude is a learned behavior?
We tend to think of it as something that comes naturally, but in actuality it is something we have to practice, and the more we practice the more naturally it happens.
The opposite is true, too. It can be only too easy to dwell in a negative state and entirely forget how blessed we are.
We might even say that we have to unlearn a lack of gratitude as well as developing a practice of appreciation to achieve lasting joy.
We live in a world where we tend to focus on the negative rather than the positive, and so forget to be aware of the abundant reality that most of us live in. Politics, the media, and the issues pertaining to this global pandemic – along with a host of other subjects – can cause anyone to head into a tailspin of negative emotion.
I’ve written before that I have a daily gratitude practice that improves my level of happiness dramatically, but I still found myself in this downward cycle last night.
After a very enjoyable evening with friends I stopped to pick up some groceries. As often happens, I ended up spending wayyy more time than I had intended in the store and as a result was home putting away groceries at nearly 10pm, tired and more than a little grumpy as a result.
“This sucks. Why am I frickin’ putting away groceries at 10 pm when I should be getting ready for bed?” I still have to do those dishes from earlier. The dog is whining. (Because I was being stupid noisy in the kitchen and she was trying to sleep…😒) Well f#ck, I just broke the coffee pot.”… (because I wasn’t being aware)
And before you know it, I’m thinking about all the other negative events from the day, the fact that my back is a little tender right now as a result of days of moving furniture and projects around the house and a host of other negatives just because. 😑
But this morning, as I prepared a gf bagel with the lox, herbed goat cheese, capers and avocado I had picked up while shopping last night for breakfast, I reminded myself that my negative state of the night before was a CHOICE that I made.
I could have been feeling excited and grateful for the gorgeous lox I found on sale, the herbed goat cheese spread that I hadn’t seen before, along with a variety of other items many would consider “luxury foods” but I am blessed to enjoy daily.
I could have been grateful for the fact that I have money in the bank to buy those groceries in the first place.
I could have been thinking about the lovely time I had with friends earlier, the myriad projects I have completed recently, the sun and blue skies that broke from days of clouds and rain here in the Pacific NW – or a thousand other wonderful things that I experience on the daily.
But instead I chose to slide from being unhappy about putting away groceries at 10pm to an all-out pity party negative state.
How many out there can relate? How often do we start our day in a wonderful mood but after reading the news or discussing politics at the water cooler find ourselves wishing for a nightcap – at lunchtime – to dampen the killer tension headache we have suddenly developed? Or we have an evening run-in with an obnoxious driver and find ourselves in a state of rage hours later, unable to sleep well as a result of the cortisol and adrenaline still in our system?
(The mind talks to the body every second, sending chemical messengers into the bloodstream in response to our thoughts and emotions. The way you feel physically is often a reflection of our subconscious thought patterns.)
Well, I don’t know about you, but I sure do like feeling happy, excited and ready to take on the world a whole lot more than being grumpy, anxious and fearful, wanting to crawl into my safe little hole instead of finding fun adventure and good friends.
And I 💯 know that the best way – maybe the only way – to get back to my best self is to change my mind state and vibrational frequencies.
I used to tell my kids to “flip their happy switch” when they were in a negative mood. Taking my own advice, this morning I made the choice to flip my happy switch. I had a fabulous walk with my pups, enjoyed my perfect cup of French press coffee (since I broke my other pot, LOL) and especially savored the preparation and consumption of that breakfast.
As I sit writing this, I am gratefully aware of the gentle breeze stirring the curtains, the soothing, happy blues, purples and yellows of my home, the green plants on my window and my big comfy couch. And my big cup of coffee, obvs.😉
It’s a good day to feel grateful.
It’s a good day to be happy.
It’s a good day to have a really, really good day. Don’t you agree?🥰
What are some things that you are especially thankful for right now? How do you best “Flip your Happy Switch”?
(This just might be the name of my next book, btw… another thing to be grateful for!🤩😁😁)
Has anyone else noticed that over the last year, we have been 💯 inundated with messages of fear? Politics. Pandemics. Mass shootings. (Oh my!)
Hostility among social groups, friends, and even our loved ones is rampant as many hold differing views on nearly every subject that anyone is talking about right now. Even some celebrities are jumping on the bandwagon of spreading hate and malcontent.
I recently came across Jim Carey’s awful “political art” letter to Melania Trump, calling her the “Worst First Lady”. Seeing it made me feel sick to my stomach.
I didn’t particularly like Melania Trump, and I really didn’t like her husband – but who knows why she made the decisions she did? I can only imagine how hard it would be to be married to DT, Amiright? But I guess the main question is, who are we to judge so harshly? How would any of us feel if that kind of vitriol was directed at us?
But there are plenty of other subjects to keep us in a state of angst.
Presidents. Vaccinations. Border control. Masks.
Stay at home. Get outside.
Open businesses fully. Close businesses fully.
Get rid of guns. More guns, greater control.
Black Lives Matter. All lives matter.
All Cops Are Bastards. Law enforcement saves lives.
De-fund police. More funding for police to provide better training.
Avoid social interaction. We need greater social interaction for emotional and physical wellness.
Peaceful protests. Out of control riots.
Democrat. Republican. Conservative. Liberal. Boomer. Gen Z. Millennial.
Save the environment. F#ck the environment.
Save the trees. Raze forests to buy more sh#t from Amazon.
The list goes on, but you get the point. Nearly everyone I speak to believes we are in crisis. Most believe this is a tipping point and many think the world is heading to hell in a handbag.
I’ve spoken to many Christians who believe we are in the “End Times” as foretold by Revelations. Shoot, I’ve spoken to agnostics and atheists who think we are in the end times. Well, maybe we are, maybe we aren’t. Doesn’t the bible also say “But of that day and hour no man, no, not the angels of heaven, but my Father only.”? (Matthew 24:36)
So why assume or speculate? Because some part of us loves the fear. Loves the drama. Loves the angst. Or, if we don’t love it, at least we accept it as “the way it is”. We become accustomed to this “new way of being” and those new neurological patterns become habits.
But habits that include daily fear, anxiety, anger, or depression can not lead to an improvement in our circumstances. In fact, living in the toxic environment of chronic stress impacts our physical and emotional well-being, compromises our immune system, depresses neurological function, and, from the level of frequency, our ability to create a good life.
This isn’t just woo-woo or psychobabble. Wondering about the science of that statement? Let’s break it down.
One of the major responses to various stressful conditions is the activation of the hypothalamic-pituitary-adrenal (HPA) axis
This is a cycle that begins with the Hypothalamus, (part of the brain responsible for stress control) where it sends signals to the Pituitary Gland (Conduit for chemical messengers that send information to cells throughout the body) that there is environmental stress. The pituitary gland sends these messengers to the Adrenal Gland, which starts pumping out stress hormones such as Adrenaline and Cortisol.
This relay of information is based on the bodies’ primitive flight or fight response. Whether the threat/stress is a saber-toothed lion, a cruel comment on social media, the news’ constant fear-mongering, or an argument about whether Trump or Biden will go down in history as the best – or the worst – president in history, the physiologic response is the same.
But let’s get back to how the HPA axis affects our body. As Adrenaline and Cortisol are pumped into the bloodstream, blood flow is re-directed from our gut and vital organs to our external limbs (fight or flight, right? Fists or feet)
Now, we generally know that the fight or flight response is a vital and necessary aspect of the survival of the human species. But thousands of years ago, it might be necessary to fight or run from a threat every once in a while. But we are living in a time when stress is constant and chronic, which means we are activating the HPA Axis on the daily. Not good.
Over time, the nourishment of our vital organs, immune system, and brain become inhibited. Really, really not good.
Add to this the fact that many of us have been isolated from our friends and loved ones (seniors and children/teens being the hardest affected by this) which also activates the HPA Axis.
(Studies have shown that in the absence of affection/love, vital statistics decrease by an average of 30%😳😳)
Is it any wonder that so many become sick, depressed, or angry?
When we become habituated in an emotional response, that response is programmed into our subconscious as a behavior, and that behavior becomes our personality, for better or for worse. So occasional frustration becomes habitual anger which becomes an angry, abusive person.
Yuck, right?
But when we habituate gratitude and joy, the same happens. Moments of gratitude turn to contentment, which becomes a happy, healthy human.
And who doesn’t want to be a happy, healthy human?
If we become aware of our emotional state – and the huge impact it has on our physical health, the vast majority of us would choose joy over frustration and anger.
Vibrant health over Dis-ease.
Love over hate.
Peace over war and bitterness.
Creation over destruction.
So here is an alternative to creating a happier reality: The next time you find yourself reacting to the media, or social media, or someone’s differing political or other views, just stop for a moment. Take a big breath and step back from that knee-jerk reaction. Remind yourself of the harm you are doing to yourself and others.
Remind yourself that you ”have a precious human life and will not waste it.”
Then step back into the conversation with kindness. Agree to disagree. Value others for their uniqueness and differences.
Curate the news you expose yourself to or shut it off completely.
Avoid toxic people or those that try to engage you in argument, even if those people are close to you. You can love someone from a distance while choosing to create better for yourself.
Seek social media presences and outlets that lift others rather than tear them down.
Find healthy habits to substitute those that perpetuate toxic cycles. Re-programming means overlaying old neurological programs.
Feed yourself nourishing foods rather than junk. Eat some good, dark chocolate.
Cut back on the caffeine.
Take Epsom salts baths.
Get outside and get some exercise, not only reaping the stress-busting perks of good physical fitness but also the myriad benefits of being in nature. (See past blog on Shinrin-Yoku/Forest Bathing)
But most of all, choose to celebrate this life rather than criticize and worry about things out of our control. Look for the good rather than the ugly. See the flowers over the weeds. Or pull the weeds and plant some flowers!
This is your garden, beloved. Do you want paradise or purgatory? Your choice. 💖
This Blessed Sacred Life 