Soren Kierkegaard wrote "Once you label me you negate me". We are amazing, complex beings. I do not believe in absolutes, and I definitely don't believe that what we do is the absolute of Who we are. That being said, some of the ingredients that make me the Who that I am: I am a mom of two amazing kids and a number of pets, a rolling stone/traveler, a writer, artist, a yogini/yoga teacher, transformative wellness teacher, 6th degree BB Karate/martial arts instructor, Thai massage therapist/Intuitive Healer. I love helping others to find their happy place, and perhaps most importantly, I am a conscious creator of my reality - and hope that maybe through some of the wisdom and experience I share, you will learn to be, too.✨
The most important relationship you will ever have is with yourself. Get to know yourself – who you truly are; what makes you – you and become comfortable in that being-ness. There are a thousand ways to gain an understanding of who you are, from self-speed dating (“Hi, Me, nice to meet you. Name ten things that make you happy”) to traveling to someplace fabulous for a ten-day retreat intended to sink deeper into the Self. Whatever means you have at your disposal to begin a relationship – a love relationship – with yourself, there is no better time than the present to do just that.
The key word here is Love. It is vital not just to know who you are, but to love who you are. All too often we love our kids, our partners, our families, and even our neighbors and communities better than we love ourselves. We nurture those around us but neglect our own needs. We snuggle and provide physical love but neglect to meet our own basic needs for nurturing and support. We prepare meals based upon what our families will enjoy but lose touch with what our own bodies are craving for optimal health – and wonder why we find ourselves in front of the refrigerator at 2 am with a pint of ice cream or a tub of cold spaghetti, crying into our Haagen Daz with no idea of where the tears are coming from, or we eat out of resentment because our families never learned to care for and nurture us in the same we do for them.
But how can those around us learn if we don’t teach them? We teach others through our own actions, and the soul is a garden that requires care-full cultivation and love. What is your soul mirroring into your external reality? If you find yourself feeling depleted and disconnected right now, take some time to nurture the soul and care for your self. Slow down, get quiet, and listen. What do you need today? Whether it is green smoothies and exercise or Haagen-Daz and a hot bath, give yourself some love, care, and grace, and don’t forget the gratitude. You are an amazing being! Care for yourself as you would a precious, loved child. Gaze at yourself in the mirror and marvel at those things that make you uniquely, beautifully you. Feed your body and spirit with what it needs – and watch your inner garden blossom. You deserve it. Much love, beautiful!
57 years ago, Dr. Martin Luther King gave a speech at the “March on Washington; a peaceful protest attended by over 250,000 people: In his speech, “I Have A Dream”, Dr. King’s words move the minds and hearts of people of all races around the world: “There is something that I must say to my people, who stand on the warm threshold which leads into the palace of justice: In the process of gaining our rightful place, we must not be guilty of wrongful deeds. Let us not seek to satisfy our thirst for freedom by drinking from the cup of bitterness and hatred. We must forever conduct our struggle on the high plane of dignity and discipline. We must not allow our creative protest to degenerate into physical violence. Again and again, we must rise to the majestic heights of meeting physical force with soul force.” Powerful words from a man who actually instigated real change in a time when racism was rampant.
Doctor King also famously said “Hate begets hate; violence begets violence; toughness begets a greater toughness. We must meet the forces of hate with the power of love… Our aim must never be to defeat or humiliate the white man, but to win his friendship and understanding.” This could be said for all of us. We should be striving for friendship and understanding with all peoples – this is the only way to lasting peace.
The recent riots have been confusing to many. What began as peaceful protests around the country in response to the wrongful murder of George Floyd by a minneapolis police officer quickly bubbled up into violent riots, killing twelve innocent people, several in cold-blooded murder – to date – and devastating the lives of many others. I have heard and read people trying to justify this behavior with reasons and excuses ranging from “People are angry from years of racism” (absolutely understandable, but NOT justified by violence and murder) to “We learned violence from the white man” – excuse my language but that is pure bullsh#t.
Take a quick look at history, friends. Racism and slavery is nearly as old as our history. Egyptians were enslaving Jews thousands of years ago. The Nazis created a hatred for Jews a hundred years ago and many still experience prejudice to this day. Africans were both enslaving and selling their own people as slaves long before the white man decided to get in on the game. For a current example, look at the entire continent of Africa where slavery is still practiced – young children being forced from their homes to join military groups, child soldiers being taught to kill the innocent in the name of the civil unrest that is rampant across the country – but often the leaders of these military groups just use guns and violence as an excuse to gain power. Young girls and women are routinely gang-raped or used as sex slaves in military encampments. I’m not in any way justifying or excusing the atrocity that is slavery by Caucasians or any other group – I’m just saying don’t use whites to justify violence, looting, and murder, and the ends NEVER justify the means when we turn our anger to violence.
Did David Dorn, a caring, well-loved African-American retired police chief from St. Louis deserve to die as he was trying to protect his friend’s business from looters? Four other St. Louis officers were shot by someone in the crowd while standing “at ease” during the protests. Did they deserve to be shot? O what about the three other officers that have been murdered across the nation? Did their families deserve to lose their husbands and fathers? What is wrong with a country that will riot and protest for one man but not for those that risk their lives every damned day? Nearly ninety law enforcement were murdered last year, but who stands for them?
What about Dave Patrick Underwood, the African American security guard who was gunned down in a drive-by, David McAtee, the bbq restaurant owner who was shot – or the others of varying race who have lost their lives over the last six days of violence? Did Korboi Balla, an African American firefighter deserve to lose his lifelong dream – the sports bar he invested his life savings in – to looters who burned it to the ground after looting it?
I would like to think that the resounding answer would no.
Again, I need to state that I am not condoning racism. Bias sucks in any form. I’ve been with friends of color and have experienced firsthand racism through their eyes and frankly, it is shocking and heartbreaking. I’ve also been in parts of the country where I was in fear of my life as a caucasian female in primarily black areas due to reverse racism. We all need to move to understanding, compassion and acceptance of our differences, whether color, sex, or belief system.
Most of us can relate to what it feels like to experience some form of prejudice or another. As a female, I and likely nearly every other woman on the planet have faced sexism from childhood on. In many countries women are still treated as slaves. American Indians have lost their way of life, their lands, and their self-respect and still battle prejudice and racism every day. Many Asians in this country and others confront racial and cultural bias in the workplace and beyond. For that matter, as an American who travels frequently, I have personally experienced intolerance for those of our country in Europe and I know many others who call themselves Canadian when traveling abroad due to this cultural intolerance.
I understand this bias. Politically and spiritually there are aspects of our country that are bereft of good, but isn’t it often the few who ruin things for the many? It is those few uneducated, ignorant “good ol’ boys” who rattle their sticks loudest and unfortunately end up representing the majority of us who are moderate in our beliefs and truly want a peaceful, healthy planet. Or those on the extreme left who are also biased, who scream “racist”, “zealot”, “nazi” to any that speak in favor of freedom – speech, religion, or otherwise – of all – rather than only those that believe as they do. Again, I repeat Dr. Martin Luther King’s words – “Let us not seek to satisfy our thirst for freedom by drinking from the cup of bitterness and hatred. We must forever conduct our struggle on the high plane of dignity and discipline. We must not allow our creative protest to degenerate into physical violence. Again and again, we must rise to the majestic heights of meeting physical force with soul force.” The media seems intent on amplifying the division we are experiencing, but it is only through unity that we can create tolerance. It is only through tolerance that we can achieve peace. It is only through peace that we can create a world that is safe, happy, and equal to all. Please, friends, let’s speak out against ALL violence. Let’s stand together in equity regardless of race, gender, culture, sexual preference or career.
I, too, share the dream of Dr. King – I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal….I have a dream that my childrenwill one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character. I have a dream that one day soon, we can stand together as one people, united by our differences and our strengthened by our sameness, meeting each other not with physical force but with soul force. Much love, friends.
This beautiful poem speaks of repeating a painful process – gathering honey from a live hive – and remaining sane through the process. Of course, the hive and the honey are metaphor for moving through a painful process, hoping that the outcome will be sweet. This is a process many of us are experiencing right now, our hands in the hive of COVID-19, and an uncertain immediate future. Frankly, for most, it sucks.
We all have been trying to learn new routines from what we have been accustomed to for years. Those of us that have families at home are finding it hard to emotionally reset as we are with our people every minute, leading to some minor craziness, especially for moms who have a tendency to be constantly “on” when families are around. Our social norms with friends and being among people – other than our families – are gone and for those of us who live alone, that sense is amplified tenfold. Added to all of this is the intense financial worry many who are unemployed are experiencing. Small business owners have and will continue to be especially hard-hit from the shut-in and many friends have already had to let go of their spaces and are uncertain of their future.
Here in Washington State, we have just gotten word that it is probable that schools will not resume on campus in the fall of 2020, leaving so many parents with school-age children in a bad place. Homeschooling for many is hard while at home full-time due to the mandatory shelter in place order, but assuming many of those folks will be getting back to full-time employment that becomes impossible. I am grateful that my kids are out of school, but my heart aches for the parents dealing with this struggle.
So as we go through this painful process, the question becomes, where is the honey? What can we hope for while being stung by a hundred bees of worry and anxiety? The answer to that, I believe, is complex – we must acknowledge our pain (I’m a big believer in crying as a release for stored negative emotions. Did you know that elephants, with their huge brains and ability for empathy, cry?) but then we need to get back to the moment. When we get into the cycle of stress, worrying about the future may feel all that the mind is capable of – but if we can just shift our thoughts, that anxiety melts away, creating ease rather than pain. Call it a distraction from the sting. When Hemmingway experienced writers’ block, he said he would write one true thing. Just one, which would always lead to the revived flow of his creativity. Can you find one true thing of joy, of beauty, or ease with which to distract your mind from the dis-ease of the moment?
Rumer Godden; an early 21st-century writer who began her career in the midst of World War 2 and went on to write more than fifty books, said: “How to be happy when you are miserable. Plant Japanese poppies with cornflowers and mignonette, and bed out the petunias among the sweet peas so they shall scent each other. See the sweet peas coming up. Drink very good tea out of a thin Worcester cup of a colour between apricot and pink…”
For me, one example of finding joy when I’m miserable is watching the way the sun streams through my living room window, illuminating the plethora of orchids and other tropical plants that I keep. I especially love it when my little Pekingese bathes in a patch of sun just below the greenery. I slow my breath and my racing thoughts and just enjoy the wash of color and light. This one true moment of ease and beauty creates a space of lightness around what felt like anxiety just a minute before, allowing the rest of the day to flow more beautifully. What is one true thing of beauty or joy you can find right now?
The next aspect of finding our sweetness is in having hope for the future. We must have something to look forward to or we lose momentum, even if that something is a dream you aren’t sure how to achieve. Having a sense of purpose plays into this – what do you feel led to do? We help others by living our own dreams, and making a difference in the world around you is another aspect of the path to fulfillment.
Do you love to create, or perhaps you have dream of becoming a teacher, a medical professional, activist, CEO, speaker or designer? If you aren’t sure of what you would like to do, start a list of things that light you up. Share your dreams with someone close, and brainstorm ways to move you in that direction. If you are already on the path, keep setting goals and moving towards them. Or maybe your fantasy is traveling the world? Start a list of countries you hope to visit first. When will they open to foreign travel? Can you find a way to visit one place on your list? If not, how can you experience the joy of travel somewhere closer until international travel eases?
If you are one of the many who were living your dream but have lost it as a result of this quarantine, you may just need to re-frame what you were doing. A friend of mine who had a beautifully designed consignment store has shifted to online sales to keep her business going. A healer I know has begun zoom and teleconferencing to continue to meet her client’s emotional needs. Many restaurants that once had great business from in-store clients have found they do just as well with takeout only.
Martin Luther King Jr. said “Only in the darkness can you see the stars.” When we gaze into the night sky, we know that the stars shining beautifully are millions of years old and light-years away (even more mind-blowing is that we are seeing them as they were a hundred years ago – effectively looking into the past) but they are still there, illuminating the darkness of the sky. When the sky is obscured by clouds, though we can not see them, we know that they are still there. Hope is just like this. The darkness around us may feel pervasive, but we know that the light is so very close – we just have to reach out for it.
When it feels like things are out of our control, remembering that ultimately, Source has our back. and things are always working out. I have found that holding this knowledge in the forefront of my mind not only helps me to stay light but also ensures that things do always work out. I use a favorite line from the poem “There could be holy fallout” by my favorite Sufi mystic and poet, Hafiz to help me stay centered around this thought: “It is all, it is all in the Beloved’s will.” Hafiz speaks eloquently from centuries past of what we so many are experiencing right now in the entire poem:
We are often in battle.
So often defending every side of the fort,
It may seem, all alone.
Sit down, my dear.
Take a few deep breaths,
Sit down, my dear.
Take a few deep breaths,
Think about a loyal friend.
Where is your music,
Your pet, a brush?
Surely one who has lasted as long as you
Knows some avenue or place inside
That can give a sweet respite.
If you cannot slay your panic,
Then say within
As convincingly as you can,
“It is all God’s will!”
Now pick up your life again.
Let whatever is out there
Come charging in,
Laugh and spit into the air,
There could be holy fallout.
Throw those ladders like tiny match sticks
With “just” phantoms upon them
Who might be trying to scale your heart.
Your love has an eloquent tone.
The sky and I want to hear it!
If you still feel helpless
Give our battle cry again,
Hafiz
Has shouted it a myriad times,
“It is all,
It is all the Beloved’s will!”
What is that luminous rain I see
All around you in the future
Sweeping in from the east plain?
It looks like, O it looks like
Holy fallout
Filling your mouth and palms
With Joy
Do what you can to find your joy in the moment. Start daydreaming about all of the amazing adventures and blessings the future will hold. Let go of the stuff you can’t control and when all else fails, know that Source has your back and though things might not go exactly according to plan, things always work out. It is all, it is all in the Beloved’s will. Much love, beautiful!
How do you feel as your mornings begin? Do you feel rested and ready for the day, or do you tend to feel a little groggy and out of sorts? How have you been managing your emotional state through the COVID-19 crisis, but especially your time before sleep and upon waking? I definitely need my morning “power coffee” to feel my best as I start the day, but most days I wake feeling well, optimistic, and excited about the day in front of me. Of course, we all have times when we wake on the wrong side of the bed. We feel depressed, irritable or just out of sorts; in a funk.
I recently had one of those days. Knowing that we are vibrational beings; at all times in an emotional frequency – our feelings follow our thoughts, and those thoughts produce frequencies that not only send messages to the universe but also to those around us – I didn’t want to pollute my families’ emotions with my bad mood. Add to that how much better it feels to feel good, I knew I had to take some steps to pull myself out of that funk and shift into a higher vibrational mindstate, which is when I open up my self-care toolkit.
On days like this, the first thing I do is try to get to the heart of why I am feeling unhappy. That particular day, my mood was likely a result of a bit of residual yuck from a couple of days of stress at home, compounded by oversleeping and bad dreams. This is often the case` when I don’t get up by seven, and lately, I’ve neglected my morning routine more often than not, staying up far too late and oversleeping as a result. Keeping to our healthy habits when other aspects of our lives may be out of sorts is especially important, and my unhappy state was an unfortunate consequence of my lack of routine.
Beyond acknowledging the why of where we are emotionally and vibrationally, we have two choices. We can continue in this negative state of mind, often cycling into a full day or more of yuck, or we can choose to shift our mindset into something better. I recognize that this often seems easier said than done – when we are feeling down, it’s easier to allow ourselves to just sink into the mud. The mud is comfortable and damn it, it just requires so much effort to lift ourselves out of the mire and start back up the hill.
It’s ok to remain in the mud occasionally. Sometimes our circumstances, surroundings, or past experience feel insurmountable in a current state, and having grace for yourself and honoring where you are is part of the healing process when depression is a result of something deeper. But feeling good feels better, doesn’t it? Being the master and commander of your ship, feeling on top of the world, and enjoying the miracles and meaningful “coincidences” that tend to manifest themselves when we are in a positive vibrational state is amazing – so the sooner we can get back to that co-creative space, the better. This is where we are best served by adding a little understanding of the science of feeling good to the spiritual and emotional aspects of living our best lives.
We have previously discussed neurotransmitters and how important they are in being healthy. Dopamine is one neurotransmitter that is largely responsible for how healthy we feel emotionally. Dopamine is a feel-good transmitter, created from Tyrosine, an amino acid that the body produces naturally when we do not consume enough, but should be ingested through food sources, as well. Good sources of Tyrosine are eggs, fish, poultry, avocado, cheese, and legumes. Exercise is another good way to increase dopamine, and interestingly enough, yoga in particular has been found to significantly increase dopamine production. (Age-related changes in cardiovascular system, autonomic functions, and levels of BDNF of healthy active males: role of yogic practice Pal R1, Singh SN, Chatterjee A, Saha M.) Beyond mood, Dopamine is linked to energy, learning, motivation, kidney and blood vessel function, attention, appetite regulation, pain and pleasure processing and movement. A deficiency of dopamine can lead not only to depression but also to obesity, addiction, and has been linked to ADHD and Parkinson’s disease.
Serotonin is another important neurotransmitter in maintaining a happy, healthy brain. Serotonin regulates sleep, memory, learning, and emotion regulation. Serotonin and Dopamine work together in vital function of brain and motor coordination, mood and appetite regulation, and many other functions, but most importantly for the sake of the subject we are addressing is how it affects your mood. Not enough serotonin equals increased anxiety and depression, an inability to digest properly/nausea, and a decrease in our ability to learn, maintain healthy relationships, and keep our vibrational state light.
The amino acid Tryptophan is a precursor to serotonin production and rich sources can be found in salmon, poultry, especially turkey, nuts and seeds, spinach, dairy and soy products. But here’s the problem – the brain/body barrier doesn’t easily assimilate tryptophan without a carbohydrate present. Simplex carbs are a no-no for healthy blood sugar levels, which also affect mood, so eat brown rice or quinoa (pre-soaking before cooking removes arsenic and saponins; toxic chemicals many plants produce and makes your grains more digestible) with your protein, whole grain, organic bread with nut butters or eggs, etc.
Regular exposure to sunlight and aerobic/cardiovascular exercise also helps the brain to increase serotonin. (https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2077351/) A brisk walk, hike or trail run, outdoor yoga, (Did I mention that yoga significantly increases dopamine and serotonin levels?😁) swimming or working in your garden can increase serotonin and dopamine and make you a happier, healthier human. So whatever activity makes you light up, do that.
Just understanding some basics of brain function can move you towards a better mindstate, but beyond that understanding, taking the steps to change a potentially dopamine and/or serotonin-deprived brain to keep moving forward are necessary to feel your best. Nourishing our body and brain with foods that increase serotonin and dopamine is an excellent beginning, but having a self-care tool kit can help get us fully back on track. Here are a few of the tools and resources that I use on those days when I need a little extra boost:
1. Gratitude: Take some time for gratitude – writing just five things you are grateful for is a powerful tool for shifting your psychological state. Try to really connect with the feeling of gratitude from your list. For example, I’ve been playing “Fortnite” recently with my son as a way to stay connected. Last night we scored “Victory Royale” for our first two matches; a team victory over the 100 other players in each game. As I wrote my list this morning, I went back to how amazing it felt to win with my son, and how we congratulated each other on awesome teamwork to get there. Just thinking about that feeling of connection lifted my spirits. (I actually have a “gratitude practice” that I use every single day – no exceptions. I believe this is a huge part of what keeps me feeling happy most days.)
2. Inspiration: Listening to inspirational podcasts, youtube videos, or audiobooks – having an outside source remind you of your value and power can be a huge help in being able to remember that power and value. Abraham Hicks, Wayne Dyer, Deepak Chopra, Tony Robbins, and many other high-vibration beings have an assortment of uplifting material to listen to or watch that can bring us back to connection with our Source and our Self.
3. Take 20-30 minutes (or more, if you have the time) for the Three “M’s”: Music, Movement, Meditation/Prayer/”Sourcing”:
What Music lifts you up and moves your? Do you prefer something classic, soft and soothing, such as Pachelbel’s “Canon”, Beethoven’s “Symphony Number 7” or “Fur Elise”, or perhaps Vivaldi’s “Four Seasons”? Or maybe jazz is your groove, and you enjoy the lively Miles Davis or sultry voice of Ella Fitzgerald. Do you love to throw down the funk or shake it to hip-hop? When I’m needing some serious energy Lizzo (Queen!!), George Ezra, Flo-Rida, Usher, or Pit Bull are a few of my go-to’s, but follow your own inspiration. Even better if you can incorporate some Movement into your music therapy – dance, do some yoga, go for a walk, do a ten-minute HIT workout. Get your energy flowing! Finally, Five to ten minutes of sivasana, quiet Meditation or prayer is not only essential self-care but also helps to be a kinder, gentler human to others – filling our cup with the good we need to be able to pour into our families, friends, and community.
4. Tuning in to the Self/Self-care: Asking your inner self what it needs physically is another tool for a positive day – what foods would best nourish you and feel a little luxurious? Could you make yourself an omelette, smoothie bowl or healthy banana bread for your first meal? What clothing choices would make you feel good? My first choice this morning was a pair of slouchy sweats and sweater. Luckily the sweater needed washing and I realized the sweats would probably just perpetuate the slouchy feeling I was experiencing, so opted for a pair of stretchy jeans and a so-soft cashmere sweater – texture can be another tool for moving into a feeling of abundance and ease, and the jeans were both comfortable and structured just enough that I felt “normal” in my dress rather than slouchy. I also put on a little make-up, though I have no plans to leave the house outside of walking my dogs, each time I look in the mirror I want to feel fabulous about the face that looks back, and a little eyeshadow and mascara help to get me there faster.
By the time I had followed my “Three M’s”, enjoyed my power coffee and gotten prepared for the day, I was 100% back to my normal, optimistic, happy self and felt fortunate that my partner made a fabulous, veggie-filled frittata for breakfast (Tyrosine rich eggs and goat cheese). Fueled by my mood and good food, I was ready to get to work – a far cry from the heavy, angsty state I had been in just a few hours before. Do you have an emotional resource toolkit that you can use when you are in a funk? I hope that on those days you are feeling a little low, you might be able to use some of the resources I have shared today to get you back into that high-flying vibrational state, into feeling the gorgeous, capable, abundant and joyful creator that you are. You deserve it!
More things are wrought by prayer than this world dreams of. – Alfred, Lord Tennyson
Desire, Ask, Believe Receive – Stella Terrell Mann
Hello Beautiful;
For many living in today’s world, the idea of prayer – or of God, whatever that may be – may feel obsolete. But isn’t faith the very substance of creation? Understanding that regardless of circumstances, everything is always working out for us is the foundation for creating a life where exactly that is true.
We may want to have faith but can’t truly accept that there is something out there so much greater than we can know – so we halfheartedly pray to a Being that we don’t really believe is there – like a child peeking through half-closed fingers, hoping that beautiful birthday cake will be on the table but not really expecting it to be. I understand this deeply. As Mulder from the X files said, “I want to believe.”
But faith can sometimes be hard when we are in the midst of sorrow or adversity and can’t see the whole picture.
The topic of God, faith and prayer is an enormous topic. But when it comes down to it, the distillation of most religious doctrine begins and ends with faith.
I believe if you truly want to manifest a fulfilled life of abundance, joy, and meaning, faith is the vital aspect of that creation; or rather, co-creation, along with gratitude and love. But it for all sentient beings, manifestation begins with want.
The simplistic breakdown of this is – we are hungry. We need food. We search for food, we find food, we eat said food and we are satisfied, at least for the moment.
But on a less basic vibrational scale, We have a desire, we ask for that desire to be fulfilled, we believe that it’s on its way and through that belief, we receive the fulfillment of our dreams and wishes.
Part of this is through our own “reality filter” – the Reticular Activating System in the brain that searches through the billions of bits of information we ingest each second through our senses for whatever our focus might be. But I believe that Source also sends unexplainable synchronicities and gifts along the way to show us the path to fulfilling our deepest desires.
As an aside, I don’t believe that Source, or God, or the All That Is is relegated to any one religion or has to be for you what it is for someone else. God is not an old guy in robes and a long white beard sitting somewhere in the cosmos judging everyone.
God is to each of us exactly what we need, and speaks to us in a language we can easily understand, and I don’t think it matters if you refer to Source as God, Yahweh, Allah, Shiva, Gaia/Earth/Nature, Sheila or George, or if you see Source as a creator God, an intelligence, or the wizard behind the curtain – as long as you believe and are willing to start a conversation.
Rumi said “We are stars wrapped in skin. The Light you are seeking has always been within.”
To me, God is Love made manifest. An intelligent Divine Spark, infused in our every molecule; into every atom of the universe – like water in cells. Like cells themselves. If you have been following my other letters, you know that molecules respond to thought. Dr. Masaru Emoto’s experiments on water are a great example of this. Researchers would speak to labeled bottles of water phrases such as “I hate you”. “I love you.” “You are beautiful.” The molecules within those bottles literally altered their physical structure depending on what content was being directed to them.
The water molecules given positive phrases took on beautiful, snowflake-like structures while the negatively impacted water altered to a similar structure as a chemically polluted river. He also studied the structural changes in water from music. The structure molecules would take on altered drastically from Beethoven to Metallica. Amazing stuff!
The point is that if molecules respond to thought, then perhaps God, whatever God may be, is in every molecule composing the fabric of the universe; and we can safely assume that those molecules respond to our thoughts in much the same way as the water molecules responded to the messages and music in Dr. Emoto’s experiments. What we put out in thought and prayer we get back, whether negative or positive – though I personally feel that God/Source/ divinity is a thinking, feeling, responder and loves deeply all that is.
Here’s where it gets especially interesting and where I believe we supercharge our creative magic. In every major religion that I have researched, commonly used prayers always begin and usually end with gratitude. To give a few examples: most of us know the Lord’s prayer – “Our Father, hallowed (Holy) be your name…” This is a form of both gratitude and acknowledgment of power. “Yours is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory for ever….” Also power and gratitude. In Islam, every prayer I have read begins in a similar manner. “Allah the Most Beneficent”…. “All the praises for Allah.” “Blessed is your name….”Your majesty is Exalted.” The Hindus chant or sing mantras from the Rig Veda and other holy scripture – repeated prayer/conversation/communication with the Divine. One of the most commonly used is the Gayatri mantra, which translated roughly breaks down to love and gratitude of God asking for wisdom and enlightenment.
Two of my personal favorite mantras are Ek Ong Kaar – God and We are One. And Ra Ma Da Sa, which is simply Sun, Moon, Earth, Space, God, I am you. Both are sung with sublime gratitude and love.
If you are interested in listening to these beautiful reminders of our connection to the divine, I would recommend Snatum Kaur’s ethereal voice. Incidentally, many believe that Hinduism is the worship of many gods, but it would be more accurate to say that each god is an avatar of one Divine being.
I see it as a way to help humans connect with the divine through accessing an aspect or attribute that is especially relatable, much as we used to worship many different gods such as Athena – goddess of wisdom and war – and Hestia, Goddess of homemakers in the Greek/Roman tradition, or Thor, God of bravery and righteousness and Balder, God of beauty and kindness in the Norse tradition. Source evolves with our understanding.
Praise and gratitude.✨
A Catholic prayer: “Thanks be to thee, my Lord Jesus Christ, for all the benefits thou hast given me, O most merciful friend, redeemer, and brother…” What I find interesting about this particular prayer is that it refers to Jesus as a brother rather than a supreme being, which would suggest an equality rather than subservience.
In the New Testament of the bible, in John 10:34, Jesus himself says “Is it not written in your Law (God’s word) ‘I have said you are Gods’?” Psalm 82:6 confirms this: “You are Gods, children of the Most High.” The scripture before speaks of mortals wandering in darkness and the scripture after says “But you will die like mere mortals and fall like every other ruler.”
This is so true – we fear to step into our power – to take full responsibility of ourselves and our lives and be the Creators we were meant to be, so we wander, fumbling in the darkness rather than lighting a lantern when we can’t see the path. But I digress.
We are meant to be creators – or co-creators – of our lives. We have the magic. We have the power within us. But for that power to fully unfold, it must begin and end with faith. Faith that Source/God has our back. Faith that things are always working out. Faith that when we ask, our prayers have already been answered. Not necessarily in the timing that we hope for, but in much the same way that atoms can exist in multiple places at exactly the same time, God has to be a timeless, dimensionless being.
We have faith that Source knows precisely the right timing for everything. Physicists have discovered that time is a construct for humans, anyway. We think time is always moving forward but in actuality, the past, present and future are happening at exactly the same moment. Mind blown, right?🤯
Much like the concept of God, I can’t even begin to fully wrap my mind around this notion, but it sure is fun to try! Or maybe that’s just my inner nerd coming through …😋
Caffeine and ADD-fueled segues aside, you probably get the gist of the letter. Faith and gratitude. Hopefully, the interjection of a little science helps you to better understand the concept and mechanisms behind co-creation and manifesting your deepest desires and wishes; to living a life on-purpose and receiving a constant inflow of abundance and blessing.
Know that there is a deeper intelligence ruling the universe, dear one. Know that you are divine and meant to be a creator. Know that you are not selfish for desiring abundance, or love, or purpose – these are seeds planted within you before you were born. It is up to you to provide the proper nourishment for those seeds, however – this is where co-creation comes in.
With desire, faith, love, gratitude, and commitment, those seeds will grow to create exactly the life that you imagine.
Today is a good day. I know it may not feel it with nearly the whole world in some form of shutdown as a result of COVID-19, and the widespread anxiety many are experiencing, but there is still so very much to be grateful for. For me, good coffee, books, my gratitude rock, the sun streaming through my window and a cozy “fire” at my feet as I write are just a few things making me happy right now – but I could name hundreds more.
This doesn’t mean I am ignoring the world situation. There is no denying that we are in the middle of a storm right now. The “Shelter in Place” happening in Washington State as of yesterday means I will not be teaching any classes, likely for a while. The beautiful studio space I looked at renting the week before things really blew up here sits empty. For millions of others in Washington and the world over, businesses will not recover and the economic impact of this will be frightening. The short-term (months) result of the worldwide shutdown will be difficult for many and feel impossible for some, and none of us can predict what the longer-term impact will be.
But how we navigate the storm will affect how we emerge. We are each of us the master and commander of our own ship – we own our thoughts, our actions, our life. So here’s the question – what does your ship look like, and how are you choosing to navigate through the wind and rain? I was recently in an office that had beautiful lithographs of the most gorgeous, six-masted ships from the late 1800’s as they sailed proudly into Bellingham Harbor; the city I largely grew up in. I would like my life to look like something from these paintings. Are you steering a sleek sailboat, a proud six-masted schooner or a broken up dingy? When we come out of this, will you stand proudly on the prow of your ship, grateful for the beautiful horizon and safe harbors you have arrived at, knowing your ship will be repaired and perhaps better than before – or will you hide in the bow, seized by anxiety?
Ultimately, we WILL get through this. We are incredibly resilient and marvelously made. So let’s focus on that. Let’s be grateful for navigating our ships through this storm together. Let’s be grateful for those that share our waters and the time we get to really be present with – perhaps for the first time in years. Let’s be grateful for the food we are able to set on our tables, for the good health that most of us still enjoy, for the projects we can get to, the walks we can enjoy, the books we have time to read. What are you grateful for today? How are you navigating your ship? Visualization is a powerful tool for creation – I would love to know what your ship looks like! Much love, friends! ⛵️🛥🛳💖
I recently read a little quote that was so simple and yet succinct in its message that I wanted to share it with you: “Accept what is. Let go of what was. Believe in what will be.” These three little sentences pretty much sum up the entire message of this and many other books written over the last few thousand years or so. I believe we come to this plane of existence for three purposes. One, to learn to be a Creator. Scratch that. We are here to learn to be motherf#cking Sourcerers. We were meant to be wizards; to remember our divinely- connected power to create our existence, for better or for worse. Second, to be of value and service to ourselves and others on this planet. Third, to have the best possible time while doing it -to have fun, live joyously and enjoy every bliss soaked moment we are given here. But the only way to achieve any of that is to follow those three sentences.
Accept and honor what is– but remember your ability to change your circumstance at any given moment. One of my favorite quotes is that everything is either a lesson or a blessing. So true, if we choose to view the trials we will inevitably experience in that way, and those lessons often turn out to be blessings in disguise!
Let go of what was – If we are to fully experience the good that these three purposes bring us, the first thing we have to do – and have to continue to practice for as long as we are here – is to release and relinquish all that does not support forward progress. This is so important I will say it again: We must release and relinquish all that does not support our forward progress! And the thing that we most often have difficulty relinquishing is our attachment to the past. But here’s the thing – we can either allow that attachment to bind us – or help us through learning the valuable lessons they have provided and moving on. Marie Kando wrote a wildly popular book entitled “The life-changing art of tidying up”. I believe the reason this book was so highly regarded is that people who were exposed to the message – of letting go – recognized that that which we own often owns us, and there is a slavery in being bound by our possessions. This message translates directly to the thoughts, memories, and emotions that we hold from the past, often going back to again and again, unable to release those negative feelings, which unfortunately turn into negative patterns of living.
Trent Shelton, former NFL wide receiver current thought leader/speaker who reaches over 60 million people every week with his honest and engaging youtube videos often reminds us that “If you don’t own your past, your past will own you.” Until we recognize that truth, we will continue to be slaves to those negative emotions and actions that are connected to our past; unable to move on to the ability to dictate and create our best possible reality that freedom from that slavery can bring us.
Believe in what will be – Faith is the foundation of creation. Taking ownership of our existence and believing not just the possibility but the probability that everything we have dreamed of is within reach, and it is our responsibility on this planet to create the happiest, healthiest and most abundant reality we can – for ourselves and others.
In the last month and a half, I have had the incredible blessing of purchasing outright a dream sportscar, traveled to Alaska, Charleston, South Carolina, and Scotland, and will be spending three weeks in Portugal from January through February. The previous year, I spent nearly three months of the year traveling, my favorite trip being the two weeks my daughter and I spent between France and the UK with friends. I am not a millionaire – yet – but I absolutely believe in my ability to co-create and manifest anything I put my mind to.
So when I start feeling that itch to get out there and see new things, I remind myself of every glorious blessing currently in my life, then put my love of travel at the forefront of my awareness – so my ability to create the trips I wish for can unfold like cotton candy from a sugar spinner. I use that analogy because the sweetness of creation feels just like that. Sugar goes into the drum, becomes heated and agitated, and begins spinning out as the delicious, light as air confection that we enjoy in the social, happy environment of fairs, carnivals and circuses. Likewise, when we have faith in our ability to shape our reality, our desires and positive thoughts go into our minds, are taken up by our RAS – (remember the Reticular Activating System, aka our awareness filter?) and the magic begins to unfold as we watch those desires spin into real things. Like sportscars, amazing trips, dream homes and the ability to share your blessings with others.
I don’t mention these blessings to brag, though it is incredibly exciting to see thoughts become things, but because I want you to see that you, also are a bountiful, abundant co-creator and director of Source; a capable creator of all that is good. If I could have just one wish for today, it would be that you would know this to be true, for when your belief meets reality, you, also will understand and be amazed by your ability to create magic and fulfill your wishes and deepest desires.
An added benefit to this knowledge is that this magic is not a “secret” to be hidden, but I know that when you become a Source-erer, you will be so excited that you will want to share your inspiration with others, as I have. And maybe, just maybe, in another decade or two, that inspiration and creation will have been passed on to enough people that this whole world will be on fire with it, and just imagine the b place this will be. Can you see it? I can, and believe me, gorgeous, it is sweeet! I love you!
You have the freedom to be yourself; your true self, here and now, and nothing can stand in your way. – Richard Bach
Hello Beautiful;
It can be a challenge to really “Know thyself”. From childhood to adulthood, we are fed so much misinformation on who we are “supposed to be” that can be a process to dig through the layers of life to unearth the Who that we wish to be underneath. Sometimes trauma, emotional or physical, prevents us from growing into our true Self. Extreme trauma can cause even those who seem to move through life with a strong sense of who they are to regress. But it doesn’t necessarily require a negative experience to keep our spirit hidden somewhere in the deepest recesses of our consciousness – sometimes it is just the day-to-day humdrum monotony or the constantly on the go business of living that causes us to forget, to get lost in the business of simply existing rather than really living.
Knowing ourselves – who we really are at our core, is also a matter of faith. Faith that we are in there, somewhere, and doing the “work” to bring that greater sense of Self to the surface is worth it. Faith that there is a higher power at work sending messages of love to our soul, wanting to draw us forward into our purpose and power rather than remain hidden in those shadowy recesses like a child too afraid to come out and play. Faith that somewhere in our being, in what sometimes feels like vast emptiness; a chasm of space that we stand teetering on the precipice of, within that gap there are entire galaxies of creativity, of joy, of love – just waiting to be birthed.
Anne Dillard wrote that it is within those gaps that the spirit’s true home can be found – “…The altitudes and latitudes so dazzlingly spare and clean that the spirit can discover itself for the first time like a once-blind man unbound.” Beautiful imagery describing something that can also feel frightening for its vastness.
But he process of becoming who you are doesn’t have to be frightening or difficult. In fact, it can be fun, joyous, and freeing in a way that will alter your mindset and ability to create – to master your own destiny – in a amazing and powerful way.
The best way to do this is to learn to really listen to your spirit; to intentionally enter that gap to tune in to what the real you is saying. Spending time in solitude and silence is a necessary part of that journey, but to those of us that spend most of our time filling that space with busyness and noise, that can be a bit challenging at first. Luckily, there are a few fun tools you can use to get you closer to accessing the stillness necessary for really listening to your inner voice and wisdom.
That a man can change himself…and master his own destiny is the conclusion of every mind who is wide-awake to the power of right thought. – Christian D. Larson
Start with writing a list of ten things that feed your spirit. By this I mean things that make you feel alive, feel at peace, feel joyful. For me it is painting, writing, reading, paddle boarding, biking, learning, hiking, trail running – well, just about anything outdoors, travel and all the adventures involved therein, spending time with people I love and ideally, spending time with them doing some of the things that feed my spirit. And about eighty other things I could put on the list that excite me. But once upon a time, I was in a place so dark that I could barely find five things to put on that list.
If finding ten genuine things that gets you excited feels difficult, go back to your childhood. What did you do for fun? What made you feel happy? Start with that and move forward, thinking about the things and events that you have experienced that really lit you up. Write them down, and try to do one thing on that list every single day. I have clients that tell me that finding ten minutes to do something that feeds them can be a challenge, but even if it’s only for five minutes at a time, it’s a start. Get up a minutes early, if you have to. You deserve to give yourself permission to do something that delights you, lovely. You really do.
Next week let’s talk about self-love and how that ties into becoming the fullest, most dynamic expression of who you are meant to be. I love you!
You are, after all, what you think. Your emotions are the slaves to your thoughts, and you are the slave to your emotions. – Elizabeth Gilbert.
Hello, Beautiful;
Deepak Chopra, world-renowned doctor, guru, and mind-body health expert said: “The mind is not in the brain. The mind is in every cell of your body.” Your body is a thinking, feeling machine. I mean this literally – there are cells throughout your body that “listen” and respond to your emotions. Cells that have receptors for neuropeptides; essentially “molecules of emotion” that dock to these receptors each time we experience a strong emotion, either positive or negative. When these receptors receive that emotional information, our body responds by pumping out more chemicals and hormones that support this emotional state. Chemicals and hormones that are fed to your immune cells, to your digestive system, to your heart, liver, lungs and everywhere in between.
This is powerful, amazing information to know about. What is especially exciting, and a little bit frightening about this truth, however, is that it means that it is vital for our own health to take radical responsibility for our emotional states and the way we respond to the emotions of others. If you have a fight with a family member or your spouse because they are in a bad mood, you take on their negative state in a physiological manner, depressing your immune response, liver function, and heart health. In fact, the immune system is not actually an “immune system” in the way we have thought conventionally at all. The latest research shows that it is, in fact, a circulating nervous system. You might even say the immune system is a circulating nervous response system.
Sixty percent of your heart cells are called “neural cardiocytes”. These cells act like brain cells. In fact, the pacemaker cells of your heart are actually neurons and can give you a far better understanding of those intuitive feelings you get about people you meet, the environment you are in and where you need to go than your brain can. We now understand that the expression “I have a gut feeling”, commonly used since the 1970s, isn’t just a metaphor. It couldn’t be more spot-on: your gut and brain are connected by millions of nerves. The gut itself produces the same chemicals the brain does, and a healthy gut will feed your brain far more accurate information about your external situations, people and environments than your brain alone ever could. It also works powerfully in creating a cycle within the biome of your body of either health and well-being or lack thereof.
The amount of rest you get each day, the people you spend time with, the degree to which you self-nurture and care, and the food you eat can also support this process, either feeding beneficial gut bacteria; also responsible for our emotional well being, or killing off beneficial bacteria to be replaced with an overgrowth of “bad” bacteria such as candida, E coli or staph. Simply cutting out chemicals found in “junk” food, artificial sweeteners and eating fewer sugars and processed foods can be huge in either maintaining or restoring a healthy digestive system.
Exercise: How are you supporting the physical and emotional health of your body? How do you feel on a day-to-day basis? Today, if you find yourself reacting negatively to a person or situation, can you take a moment to step back, quietly observe the reaction and allow it to pass? If you are feeling tuned in to your own state, you might even ask where your reaction is really stemming from – for me, I found myself responding to negative emotions and realized much of the time, it was from a deep-rooted sense of abandonment, begun in earliest childhood. Just the awareness of this fact was an incredible asset to me in learning to separate others’ emotions from my own.
It may be difficult at first if you, like me, pick up and respond strongly to others’ moods and emotions, but with practice, you should notice that that response system becomes lessened, and sending people in a negative or even toxic state love and compassion becomes easier. If all else fails two of my personal favorite mantras are: “Not my circus, not my monkeys” or “Let that shit go”, accompanied by the image of a baby Buddha meditating in a pair of headphones for keeping my own response system – and internal biome – healthy and happy. Play a little with what works for you, but most important is simply the awareness of what is happening in your body each and every time you allow yourself to be drawn into a negative or toxic state.
We live in a society where topical perfection is a status symbol. Social media, television, magazines, even our own self-talk affects our ability to be able to celebrate ourselves and the unique perfection that each of us holds. Instead, we experience chronic low self-esteem that many of us keep tightly bound in our skins and around our spirits. As a result, instead of the joy we should experience bathing in the freedom of our authenticity – and sharing that freedom with others, our insecurities often lead us to treat other humans, particularly those we find intimidating, with meanness, cutting each other down instead of building each other up.
But here is a small miracle that each one of us can try that will change nearly every experience you have with those we encounter, whether the clerk at the grocery store or the barista making your favorite morning brew: When you find yourself reacting negatively to someone, take a breath, smile, and Be Kind. Compliment one thing you genuinely like or appreciate about that person – maybe they have incredible hair, a great smile or an inflection in their speech that you find interesting. Or just ask about their day. They might feel a little awkward with the compliments, but nine times out of ten, if the energy was negative to begin with – whether it was due to your insecurities or theirs – (or maybe they were just having a bad day) your kindness will turn it around, and you just might learn something about yourself.
If you find yourself having a negative reaction to someone you meet or even on social media, television, etc., with no visible reason, do some soul searching – what is it that is causing your reaction? How does it feel, really? Being positive, feeling blissful and at peace always feels better, doesn’t it? How can you feel your best and share that good feeling with others if you are angry, resentful or insecure? So start celebrating yourself, darling, because you are fabulous. You are worthy. You are amazing! You deserve to shine your light – and you can help others to do the same by celebrating the good you can see in them, even if they can’t see it themselves.
Share love! Give genuine compliments. Build others up – you didn’t get to be the fabulous person you are today without some help and a lot of love from others, so let’s pay it forward. Celebrate others along with yourself. “Love” those efforts people make to share their own authenticity and creativity, even if it isn’t your brand of authenticity and creativity. Remember that when someone shines brightly, they aren’t dimming your own light, but rather giving you loving permission to shine just as brightly.
This Blessed Sacred Life 